PROLOGUE
There isnothing better than block parties where pizza frittes and stale beer waft through the air. The scents not only make your mouth water, but also spark your memory bank, offering feelings of nostalgia for years to come. Maybe when you need it. Or least, when you don’t expect it. Funny how nostalgia works.
The section of the Bronx where I grew up was littered with transplants from every passionate, hand-talking country you could imagine. And in the summer, we’d play in the street, sneak our parent's booze into Gatorade bottles, and listen to the old-timers argue about who made the best homemade liquors.
I realized as I grew older, block parties took place whenever enough adults wanted to kick back and not sweat inside. Air conditioning was for the rich and most homes only had a window unit in one room. Not to mention, most of the adults in this neighborhood would rather drink together and swap stories on sidewalks and front steps.
It was a melting pot, and that meant lots of clashing cultures, but somehow our snippet of life worked, and everyone managed to get along. Functioning as a big extended family. The Irish lived three blocks over. The Portuguese families mingled with the Greeks. And the Puerto Rican brothers, who, I still believe, were lovers and not brothers, taught me how to dance to more than just the tarantella. The owner of the bodega on the corner, Thiago, was Dominican. The best diner on the block was run by a Sicilian family, whose oldest son, according to my father, stole my innocence, but in all honesty, I handed over my virginity to that magnificent sex toy the moment my senior prom was over.
The Fourth of July was the biggest of the block parties. Every person in our surrounding blocks was proud to be from whatever country they migrated from, but on the Fourth of July, we were all proud Americans. Owning a piece of their dreams to start fresh, provide for their families, and be a part of the greatest city in the world. Fireworks started at noon, went on throughout the night, and well into the morning hours.
And while I lie here, thinking about all the amazing things that make up my life in this six-block radius, it was the people who surrounded our family who made life more special. Loud and overbearing, likely arguing, but there was always food cooking, conversations that flowed into tangents, and a sense of safety that was irreplaceable. Except for right now. Where are they all right now?
There is nothing safe about this moment. The ringing in my ears is making everything else loudly silent. I can only blink slowly and make out the figures in the farthest part of my family’s duplex. I feel a dripping down my face. The smell of birch or maybe black licorice, permeates around me. The tall figures are now standing above me. They spat on my face.
Lion, tiger, bear.
A shooting pain hits my lower stomach. Once, twice, three, maybe four times.
A deep, accented voice vibrates in my head. “I made your father a promise a long time ago, Su-ka. He crosses me, and every single person he cares about will suffer for it. I gotta say, I didn’t think I’d be collecting on that promise, but here we are.”
Lion. Tiger. Bear.
My breathing is quicker now. I can’t take a full breath. I watch as my father is dragged into the room. I can only see his lower body, and he’s yelling my name. “Gia!Il mio piccolo fiore limone.No, no! I have no reason to betray your trust. I have nothing to tell. Please no,” he cries. “Kill me, leave my daughter. Please, please,” he yells again. “Lemon blossom, you are strong. I love…” His voice cuts out, and my heart stutters.
Lion.
I can’t say anything. My body feels heavy, but hearing my father plead for my life has me confused and angry. I’ve never heard him ask for anything. My father is a force. Large in stature, but even bigger in a room. A booming voice, spacious hand gestures. He’s never sounded so small, so scared. I’m not an idiot. I know the kinds of people he works with, but I never thought past the idea of it being dangerous. Dangerous is a word that’s cautionary if you’ve never experienced or witnessed any type of violence. It never carried the weight it should have. Now that I’m lying here, unable to feel anything and watching my father cry and plead for my life, I realize I’ve miscalculated the heaviness of the word.
I hear a loud bang like a can of coins being violently shaken.
Tiger.
Everything after that is hazy. It’s like the sounds of people speaking when you’re underwater. Deep and muffled, with no pitch or clarity. I see a foot cocked back and ready to kick me.
Bear.
I say a short prayer to whatever deity is listening. Whichever god or goddess wouldn’t mind intervening on a whim. My surroundings darken. The sounds are all gone in an instant. Everything that hurts in my stomach and head is erased. I don’t move. And I’m not sure if it’s to make them think I’m dead or if I really am.
I crack an eyelid open slightly, as much as it will allow, because I’m certain that the left one is swollen shut. Getting pummeled in the face will do that. And that’s when I realize I should have kept it closed. The man who raised me, who gave up so much to ensure I was cared for, is bleeding out in front of me only a few feet away. I can’t move to help him, but even if I did, the way his eyes are looking at me now is no longer filled with pride or joy. There is no life or love left in them. Instead, I stare at my pops, and I make a promise that I’ll survive this. For him.
What feels like hours later, I hear yelling and banging. Numbers and names are shouted from voices I don’t recognize. A hand touches my neck.Goddess. It searches for movement. “Sargeant, we’re going to need a bus. I feel a pulse on this one.”
Her raspy voice barks back, “Fuck, this is a mess. Meet the medics at the curb, keep it off the radio. Go. Now! If there’s an audience, I want the lines up and everyone pushed as far back as possible.”
I see hurried feet moving. “Hang in there, darlin’. We got you.”
I mumble, “Lion. Tiger. Bear.”
“I can’t understand you, honey. Let’s go. Here, I need you guys in here now!” the voice yells urgently.
I try to yell for my father, but nothing comes out except a cough.
I miss him already.
Then everything goes black.
PARTI