“If I did, Mom would be pissed,” he said as he propped his chin up in his hand. “Dad would know it was because of me. Especially if you were to suddenly quit.” He heaved up. “This is just another way you’ve screwed me over. What the fuck am I supposed to do now, Grace?”
I shrugged, not bothered by his bitching. “I’ll stay out of your hair if you stay out of mine.” That seemed like the best solution. “As soon as Dad figures out parts isn’t a good fit for me, I’ll go to the next job. Then you don’t have to worry about seeing me again unless you’re at my apartment, and when I visit Mom and Dad on Sundays and holidays.” I got to the door and gave him a final look. “But if you’re just using Shay to get back at me and you do something stupid to fuck her over,” I narrowed my eyes, “I will make you regret it.”
“I’m not fucking her over,” he said after a beat. He ran his hands through his hair. “But do all the posturing you need to do.” He just looked at me. “You should worry more about yourself than me. You’ve got three people in your bed that have every reason to hate you, every reason to fuck you over.” He shrugged. “But keep worrying about me.”
I stepped out of his office. I didn’t want to face him. Especially not with the note of truth he’d just handed me.
Chapter 29
Grace
Doubt ate at me. And I hated that it was Kyle that had put the thought in my head. It wasn’t hard to believe that at least Adam and Darius would want to pull the rug out from under me. I had put both of them into a position where they had every right to be angry with me. Through the entire aftermath, they hadn’t reached out to me. Only Cam had.
Cam wasn’t in on it, was he? He seemed to be invested. He wouldn’t have brought me to his bed just to hold me if he was gonna give me a taste of my own medicine, would he?
I sat on the couch in the living room, spiraling downward. I didn’t know if I should message any of them. If I brought up my doubts, what would they do? Would they realize the jig was up? Would they laugh? I hadn’t laughed at any of them, or Kyle. Just the idea of one of them laughing at me, after everything I’d let them do to me, hit me hard.
Was that why Adam wanted to have sex without condoms? He wanted me to get pregnant so it would be just a bigger knife in the back? I choked. I had said I wanted that. Not to get pregnant, but to feel them come in me.
“You are such a fucking idiot,” I said out loud.
“I know you are not talking to me like that,” Shay said as she opened the door to the apartment. She narrowed her eyes at me. “I’d hope you weren’t talking to one of your men like that, either. If you do, that’s pretty harsh.”
“They’re turning this around on me,” I said as she closed the door.
She stopped just at the couch, her exhaustion obvious. “What? Hang on.” She dropped her purse on the coffee table and kicked off the heels she wore. She even went as far as reaching back to unhook her bra and, after some maneuvering, she pulled it out of the front of her blouse. She dropped onto the couch beside me and sighed. “Okay, I need you to say that again, but make sense.”
“Yesterday, when I was with the three of them, Adam said he wanted to do it without condoms,” I explained uneasily. “They are trying to get me pregnant so they can dump me with a baby, or they’re trying to get me good and invested so they can break it up and make me feel horrible.”
Shay stared at me for a beat. “Don’t have sex with a man without protection. A baby isn’t the only thing that can come from that.” She shook her head. “Why would you think they would do this whole charade just to make you feel bad? I’m pretty positive you’ve already gone through all that.”
“Why wouldn’t they?” I asked. “We were about to go forward, and they beat my ass—”
“They hit you?!” she asked, her voice raising. “Darius fucking hit you?!” She got her phone out of her purse. “Me and Mama are gonna havehisass.”
“Not like that,” I protested. I waved both hands. “It was in the sexy way.”
“There’s nothing sexy about getting hit,” she shot back.
“Are you trying to tell me that no one has ever slapped your ass while you were getting it from behind?” I asked.
“Oh,” she said as she relaxed back on the couch. “Yeah, that’s okay. But that’s not the same as them ‘beating’ your ass. There’s a distinct difference between someone slapping your ass while you’re getting it and someone beating it.” She eyed me. “You need to be more specific when you say shit like that.”
“I didn’t think you would immediately jump to it being abusive,” I said easily. “I don’t think any of them would outright hurt me like that. Not physically.” I looked away from her, getting lost in the black screen of the television. “But I’ve put all three of them into a position that changed a lot for them. Especially Adam. There are plenty of reasons for them to get back at me.”
Shay pursed her lips as she considered me. “You think Kyle is doing that to me?”
I shook my head. “I hope not.” I took a breath. “I told him he’d end up in a ditch if he did.”
A smile spread over her face, lighting up over the concern she’d had on it before. “Thank you, baby. It’s nice to hear that you’d murder your brother for me.” She turned toward me fully, pulling a leg under her as she redirected our attention back to my worries. “There’s only one way to find out if your boys are serious about the relationship you’re trying to have.”
“How?” I asked, unable to hide my confusion.
“Ask Cam,” she said, like it was the most obvious thing. “Duh.” She rolled her eyes. “I don’t think that man can keep a secret, and if he is in on the plans for fucking you over, he’ll come clean pretty quickly.”
“Put pressure on Cam?” I asked, not sure I was on the same page. Then his frustration at Adam and Darius for spanking me came to mind. “Maybe you’re right,” I said as I dug my phone from my pocket.
“Maybe?” Shay snorted.