The weight on my chest alleviated knowing she had a good support system, but it hurt my pride to have the honour of tending to my wife taken away from me. “I’m glad to hear you’re feeling okay.” I downed my drink and filled another one. Seeing the ice cubes resting in a bucket brought another wave of longing. And a semi. “How is the book coming along?”
“It’s finished.” She yawned. I should let her go to bed. I was just so desperate for a few more minutes with her. “I’m releasing it in a few weeks.”
“I’m so proud of you,” I said gruffly. “So fucking proud.”
If I had to buy ten thousand copies of her book the first day it released to put her on best-selling lists, so be it.
“Thank you, Zeno. I can’t wait for you to read it.” I wanted to kiss her so badly right now. “I really hope you enjoy it.”
“I love your writing,mon ange. You can jot down a grocery list and I’ll read that too.”
She sputtered a weak laugh that ended with a pained groan. It severed me in half. “H-How are you doing?”
I’m half aheart without you. Barely functioning. Barely breathing.“I’m doing okay.”
The good news was both our PR teams managed to do some solid work. Most of the pictures that were taken the night of the auction were seized. Having connections with media moguls also helped flip the script and ensure no articles about us got published.
However, the higher-echelon crowd present that night had long memories and gossiping mouths. But with a name like De la Croix and Hill, most of these vultures wanted to be in our good graces.
Meaning they’d shut the fuck up.
Otherwise, bodies would start to disappear left and right, and they knew it too.
“How are you feeling now that Ben is gone?” she whispered.
Mere days since his death, I was slowly moving on—while making peace with our new reality—without focusing too much on him. The legitimate side of our business would suffer since Benjamin was a high-ranking employee. We needed to find his replacement at De la Croix Inc as soon as possible. On the illegal side of things, the news of Benjamin’s death spread like wildfire in the underworld. There was speculation that Yves’s youngcapitainehad to be put down. We tried to make it sound like his death was a fatal accident, but the Russians and Italians were still on the fence.
“I’m fine, Darla. The family in France is getting a bit impatient. In a few days, I need to leave Montardor to tend to some critical business.”
“What kind of business?”
I wasn’t supposed to cause my wife emotional distress, but I promised no more lies. “They’re going to officially initiate me as the new leader of the family.”
I could practically hear the wheels in her mind turning. “Is there a possibility of you getting hurt during this so-called initiation?”
Yes.
“No, little angel. I’m going to be fine,” I swore, my words now a slur, courtesy of my fourth glass of whiskey. “I miss you so fucking much.”
“You just miss my burnt cookies.” She tried to downplay it.
“I miss holding you at night. I miss running my fingers through your hair. I miss kissing every inch of you before whispering good night in your ear.”
I missed the way she’d ride my dick while inhaling my smoke through her mouth like a bad fucking girl. I missed the way she’d wrap her arms around me from behind and try to lift me up like she was the female Hercules; and how she’d fail, laugh, and tell me she needed to start lifting more dumbbells. I missed the way she’d step on a stool some mornings to do my tie and add her pin, while humming a song under her breath. I missed the way she watched me with a possessive look in her eyes whenever I was doing something mundane like cooking, driving, reading, or sweating from my workouts.
Or how she’d send me flowers and chocolates to my office every Friday because she had plans of taking me on a date and stealing my virginity in a hotel room.
Okay, so I missed my wife by a long stretch.
I ran my fingers through my hair and tugged. “I can’t be without you. I don’t know how anymore, Darla.”
“Zeno, you promised,” she said raggedly.
The S-word taunted me. “I know.”
“I have to go take my meds but please stop drinking tonight. Go to bed early and we’ll talk soon.”
I sighed. “Goodnight, darling.”