“No!” I fought, but she pulled me to her, and I lost all that fight. I collapsed into her arms and I cried. I screamed and I cried into the arms of the woman I’d barely spoken to in two years. But right now, I needed her. I needed someone who understood.
Understood what losing Poppy would be like.
So I let it all out. I gripped on to her so tight I thought it would leave a bruise. But my mamma never moved; she cried with me. She sat quietly, cradling my head as I lost all strength.
Then I heard movement from the doorway.
My pappa was watching us with tears in his eyes, sadness on his face. And that reignited the flame in my stomach. Seeing the man that took me away, that forced me from Poppy when she was about to need me most, it snapped something inside.
Pushing back from my mamma, I hissed at him, “Get out.”
My mamma stiffened and I pushed her back further, glaring at my pappa. He held up his hands, shock now etched across his face. “Rune…,” he said in a calm voice.
It only fueled the flames.
“I said get out!” I stumbled to my feet.
My pappa glanced at my mamma. When he looked back at me, my hands were clenched. I embraced the rage burning inside me.
“Rune, son. You’re in shock, you’re hurting—”
“Hurting?Hurting?You have no damn idea!” I roared, and stepped an inch closer to where he stood. My mamma jumped to her feet. I ignored her as she tried to move into my path. My pappa reached forward and pushed her behind him and out into the hallway.
My pappa closed the door slightly, blocking her out.
“Get the hell out,” I said one last time, feeling all the hatred I had for this man boiling to the surface.
“I’m sorry, son,” he whispered, and he let a teardrop fall to his cheek. He had the audacity to stand before me and shed a tear.
He had no friggin’ right!
“Don’t,” I warned, my voice cut and raw. “Don’t you dare stand there and cry. Don’t you dare stand there and tell me you’re sorry. You have no damn right when you were the one who took me away. You took me from her when I didn’t want to go. You took me from her while she got sick. And now … now … she’s dy—” I couldn’t finish the sentence. I couldn’t bring myself to say that word. Instead, I ran. I ran at my pappa and slammed my hands on his broad chest.
He staggered back and hit the wall. “Rune!” I heard my mamma shout from the hallway. Ignoring her plea, I fisted my pappa’s collar in my hands and brought my face to hover just in front of his.
“You took me away for two years. And because I was gone she cut me off tosaveme.Me. Save me from the pain of being so far away and not being able to comfort her or hold her when she was in pain. You made it so I couldn’t be with her while she fought.” I swallowed, but managed to add, “And now it’s too late. She has months…” My voice broke. “Months…” I threw my hands down and stepped back, more tears and pain taking hold.
With my back to him, I said, “There’s no coming back from this. I’ll never forgive you for taking me away from her. Never. We’re done.”
“Rune…”
“Get out,” I snarled. “Get the hell out of my room and get the hell out of my life. I’m done with you. So damn done.”
Seconds later I heard the door shut, and the house fell into silence. But to me, in this moment, the house sounded like it was screaming.
Pushing the hair from my face, I slumped down on the overturned mattress, then leaned my back against the wall. For minutes, or it could have been hours, I stared at nothing. My room was dark save for the light from a small lamp in the corner of the room that somehow had survived my rage.
I lifted my eyes, and they settled on a photo hanging on the wall. I frowned, knowing I hadn’t put it there. My mamma must have hung it today when she unpacked my room.
And I stared.
I stared at Poppy, only days before we left, dancing in the blossom grove, the cherry blossoms she loved so much in full flower around her. Her arms were stretched to the sky as she twirled, her head tipped back as she laughed.
My heart clenched at seeing her this way. BecausethiswasPoppymin. The girl who made me smile. The girl who would run to the blossom grove, laughing and dancing all the way.
The one who told me to stay away from her.I’ll stay away from you. You stay away from me. We’ll finally put us to rest…
But I couldn’t. I couldn’t leave her. She couldn’t leave me. She needed me and I needed her. I didn’t care what she had said; there was no way I was leaving her to endure this alone. I couldn’t if I tried.