“Maybe.” I said, and then added, “I like working in the garden with you.”
“I like it too.”
Comfortable silence followed for a bit as we worked together. I broke it when I asked, “How did you know Dad was the one?”
A faraway look moved over her expression as she remembered. “It wasn’t like you see in the movies. I didn’t see him and my heart immediately started to race and my palms grew sweaty. It was only after being together for a while, finding that rhythm, little things like him making my coffee and knowing how I take it.” She smiled. “Or handing me the Entertainment section of the newspaper without being asked.” She glanced over at me. “Rubbing my feet after a long day, or holding my hand when we watch the sunset. We went from two people to a couple, and I knew I wanted to be linked to him forever.”
My young heart sighed because I wanted that. I wanted to be a part of a couple. I wanted someone who, even after decades together, still looked at me like it was the first time. “I can’t wait to fall in love.”
Mom reached for my hand. “Falling in love is wonderful, but it doesn’t always last, so as wonderful as it is to fall, it can hurt just as much when it’s over.”
“I know.” Not from personal experience, but I watched enough movies to get an idea.
“You might get your heart hurt a few times, but don’t do what some do: close off, play it safe rather than risk another broken heart because, without taking risks, how are you to find extraordinary?”
“I won’t, but falling in love a few times when I haven’t fallen at all yet seems unlikely.”
“You will. You don’t see it, but one day, you will.” She stood and reached her hand down for me. “Besides, you are falling. You’ve been falling since you were eleven.”
She was right.
She collected the basket of flowers. “How about we make some brownies, put on a movie?”
“Your award-winning chocolate caramel brownies?” And they were award winning, taking first place at the county fair four years running.
“I bought the ingredients this morning.”
“Sounds perfect.” We had just reached the house when I said, “I love you, Mom.”
She didn’t miss a beat when she replied, “I love you too, Cedar.”
Chapter Two
Brock
Sitting on thefront of my car, I drained the bottle of beer. I welcomed the numbness that followed. Looking up at the dark sky, not even the stars were out.
A bonfire lit the night, the flames shooting up into the darkened sky. We wouldn’t have long, the cops would come, but we’d get at least an hour. People were pairing off. Declan finally got Layla in the back seat of his car. There were a few chicks giving me the look, the one that said they’d climb into the back of my car. I’d been there, done that. I wanted something different. Someone different.
My mind wandered to earlier in gym class. I couldn’t help the grin when Cedar popped into my head. I remembered the first time I saw her. Fourth grade. Her hair was even wilder then. She was missing her front tooth. The first day of school, and she was wearing a skirt that had cupcakes all over it and a pink tee with a cherry in rhinestones. Kids snickered at her, even then the stereotypes were set, but she didn’t seem to care. Didn’t even seem to notice. I envied her being so sure of who she was, even back then, envied that she took the path least traveled, even knowing it was going to bring her heartache, but it didn’t stop her. For a time, our paths had run side by side. I’d never had a friend like her before and knew I never would again. I missed her, but I kept my distance, watching as she went from the little kid I knew to the beauty she was now. She didn’t see it, downplayed it, but she was beautiful, largely because what was on the outside was on the inside, too. She was good, down to the bone.
From the beginning, I’d taken to watching over her as she skipped down that untraveled path of hers. In the years after our paths diverged, it wasn’t just the thought of protecting her free spirit that had me continuing to safeguard her. She was like trying to catch a rainbow, larger than life and unreachable. It was almost better that she was, unblemished from the bullshit that tied most people down. Didn’t stop me from wanting her. She’d been chewing on her lower lip in gym class, a nervous gesture, but I had a hell of a time pulling my eyes from her mouth. I wanted a taste. Most couldn’t see past her quirkiness, her eclectic wardrobe, but if they could, they’d see what I did. She usually wore those black frame glasses, something else I found fucking adorable, but they hid her best feature, big green eyes that were the color of summer grass. Even her hair, all those wild dark brown curls, she rarely wore it down, but when she did, I wanted to sink my hands into it, pull her close and kiss that mouth. I wanted her. I knew she wanted me too. I felt her eyes on me, saw the way she looked at me. I knew even at eleven that what we shared would shift…change. It was why I pulled back, before that change happened. There were times when I actually entertained the idea of asking her out, giving in to what I wanted, but the kid I’d been was gone. I wasn’t sure she’d care too much for the man I was growing into.
Moving off my car, I tossed the bottle in the bucket and reached for my keys. The sound of motorcycles pulled my attention. Dax came down the dirt path, a few of his brothers with him, members of the Iron Guardians MC. I worked on their motorcycles. Harry Kemp owned the best garage in the tri-state area. He was a good boss, a better man. Whenever I had trouble at home, he’d offer me the cot in the back of the garage. No questions asked. He was offering that cot a lot more lately.
I’d told Dax about the bonfire. I probably shouldn’t have. Most of the people were underage, and these weren’t guys who would care about that shit, but then looking around, the girls here had done the rounds. It was likely they’d be up for a rougher ride.
Dax pulled up next to me and shut off his Harley. “You leaving?”
“Yeah.”
He looked around, a grin curving his lips. I glanced around. Saw he’d gained the attention of most of the girls. I’d invited the fox into the hen house. It was easy to forget who he was because he could be so easygoing, but then knowing who he was, I was sure it was intentional, unassuming made it easier for a predator to draw in its prey.
He climbed from his bike. Offered me his hand. I didn’t hesitate to take it. His grip was like him, unyielding. There were rumors that their MC ran drugs, did other shady shit. I knew for a fact that they did because he and his brothers talked when they came to the garage, shit they didn’t care I overheard, so imagining the shit they kept quiet was a scary thought. “Thanks for the invite,” he said.
I threw a wish out that there wouldn’t be any collateral damage before I said, “Sure.”
He started toward Misty. I didn’t stick around for the show, and there would be one because Misty liked to perform.