His jaw tightened and he quietly said, "You were scared of me. When I couldn't speak, you stared at me like you'd seen a ghost. You were revolted by my weakness."
She looked down and let out a breath. "Please come here."
The chair scraped against the tiled floor as Chris got up and sat down on her bed beside her feet.
She looked at him. "Closer."
He opened his mouth to, no doubt, protest but resorted to exhaling, then scooted closer.
Giselle rested her hand on his. He held it back firmly. "Chris." He gulped. "You can never scare me," she said, "I wasn't scared of you. I can never be r-revolted... I was scared of what I'd done to you."
He looked away.
She grabbed his chin and turned his face to her. He blinked. "When you couldn't speak, I was horrified! I didn't know what to do. You were choking yourself! I didn't know what I'd done to you, or what I'd done to cause you so much pain." She left his chin and rested her hand on his cheek. "Please don't hate me. You're everything to me, Chris. Don't punish me anymore... Please don't take yourself away from me..." She sniffed. "I'm so sorry."
He let out a shaky breath and shook his head. Grabbing her hand, he pressed his lips on her palm. She sighed, her tears falling as Chris kissed her hand repeatedly.
His eyes glistened, too, as he rose to his feet and kissed her on the forehead. He let his lips linger on the skin, then sat next to her, closer than before.
"Chris..." she whispered.
He held her face in his hands. "You scared me. Y-you weren't waking up. I th-thought I'd lost y-you. I thought I'd never be happy again."
Her heart shattered inside her chest.
"When I s-saw you on the f-floor... When I saw you bleeding, I w-wanted to k-kill myself." His face lost expressions for a moment at his declaration.
She held his hands to her face and said, "I'm okay..."
He looked at her, his eyes haunted. "And then... Then he... The whole house echoed when the gun went off. I waited for the p-pain. I waited to d-die. I was sure he'd shot me. I was sure I wouldn't be able to s-s-save you... And then... It was a blur. He was on the f-floor. I didn't kn-know what to do... Who to save..."
She gasped for air, her eyes burning, tears sliding down her face. She didn't know who she was crying harder for—Chris, Xavier, or herself...
"The police asked so m-many questions. Alex handled it all, but even when I had to b-bury Xavier, all I could th-think about was you! That you weren't waking up!"
Her hands wrapped around him as he leaned closer to her, holding her body to his. He didn't speak any more words and let her cry her heart out. The way his body shuddered, Giselle knew that he was breaking down, too.
They parted after what felt like forever. She took a deep breath and looked at him, her eyelids heavy with exhaustion.
There was still the matter of Amara...
She gulped. "Tell me everything about Aquaville."
Chris nodded but didn't say anything for a long time. Every now and then, he'd take a deep breath and strip himself of any facial expressions. Her heart broke with his every attempt.
He got up, walked toward the table in the corner of the room, and grabbed a document placed on it. He sat beside her and took a deep breath again.
"I wasn't involved," he said, his voice calm. "I wanted to tell you that night when you asked me how I e-e-escaped Xavier's r-revenge." He paused, taking a few breaths. Then he looked down and said, "I wasn't one of them, Elle. You b-b-broke me that night. You d-didn't ask me why I d-didn't stop them. You d-didn't ask how a man like m-me ended up with p-people like that. You asked me how I e-escaped... As if you were already c-convinced that I was c-capable of that... Did you n-not know me at all?"
She'd been asking herself the same question.
He looked up, gulped, and focused his eyes on her face. He waited a few moments, then said, "They'd seen the kid and were p-planning to... You know... Alex was there, too. We both tried to stop them. I don't know what it was. They'd never behaved that way. It was always catcalling women. I n-never participated in that. Hell, I never even sat with them in college, Elle! They used to call me a loner because all I'd do in college was play my football, study, and talk to you on the phone all day.
"But that summer..." He gulped. "I just wanted to be away. I wanted to feel b-better. Mom and dad had died. I had n-no one to come home to, and I didn't want you to see me depressed like that, so I went when they planned that trip. Alex was already going, and we were on the same football team, and we were friends from school, you know. He knew about my parents and understood my mental state. So when he asked me to join them, it seemed like a pretty good idea. I didn't kn-know what they were capable of."
She stared at him, her heart heavy, hating herself for even doubting him.
"We tried to stop them," he said. "We'd gotten into a fight over it. Don't you remember that I came home with a cut on my forehead? I told you that I’d hit my head when I’d fallen. Well, they'd pushed me during the fight. Alex and I came back the same day they hurt her. Look."