"Okay."
He stared at her. "Please be angry."
"I was," she said calmly, "and you traumatized me for it."
He stayed silent for a while. "Will you hate me for the rest of your life?"
She sighed. "I don't hate you, and I hate myself for it. I understand your pain. I understand your judgment and lack thereof." She gave him a sharp look. "But I can't forgive you."
"I'm not asking for it."
"Good."
He nodded, then gulped. "I just want to say that I've loved you with everything I have, even if what I had wasn't enough, and that I'm truly sorry for what happened. Whether I wanted it to happen or not, it hurt you, and I'll never forgive myself for it."
She nodded.
"Thank you for dropping the charges, by the way," he said.
"You'll receive your restraining order soon."
He paused. "I deserve it."
She nodded again. She wanted to hurt him and take his pain away, both at the same time.
He exhaled shakily. "Giselle, I will never bother you again. But I couldn't leave before telling you one last time that I love you and will always do."
"Why?" She didn't know what she was asking.
He shrugged. "I never got to say it to my mom before she died. I couldn't say it to Amara. If this is truly the last time we're meeting, which I don't doubt, then I want you to know that my heart is full of love and care for no one except you." His eyes welled up with tears, and she resisted the urge to forgive him, reminding herself to be strong. "I told you I wasn't a prince, that I was a man wearing a black cape."
She shook her head, her heart pounding, then whispered, "You ruined everything."
"You'll never see me again."
"Good."
He stayed silent. She waited for him to leave, but then he said, "I think I'll go back to Aquaville."
She nodded, not knowing what to say, not knowing how to react, unable to distinguish between right and wrong, stuck in gray.
"Might visit Amara." He chuckled without humor. "My beloved sister."
She looked at him as he stared at the space between them, his tears dropping straight down one by one. She remembered those words. Her heart ached for him, for everything he'd been through, for everything he'd seen, and for every trauma he had to endure. How had he not lost his mind already?
"A demented soul," she finished for him repeating what she'd read on the grave, her voice heavy with emotions.
His eyes snapped up to meet hers, flicked to her lips, then back up to her eyes. "How did you...? Did you visit her grave?"
Panic rose within her. She shouldn't have said anything. She didn't want Xavier to think that he still had the power to manipulate her. She didn't want him to misinterpret her visit to Amara's grave.
She cleared her throat. "No, I just stumbled upon it."
"How?" His brows merged, spreading a wave of fear throughout her body. She didn't want him to hurt her again, neither physically nor mentally. She couldn't comprehend why she'd gotten so nervous all of a sudden. What did she have to hide?
"We were just visiting Chris's friends in the graveyard," she said quickly.
He smiled a little, and relief spread through her body. "How did his friends end up in Aquaville?"