You’re forty-two, Caleb. Forty-fucking-two.
But I feel so out of my depth here, like a teenager who is about to try and talk to his crush for the first time. Except, this isn’t the first time, and the woman stood in front of me was more than a crush.
“Cameron, can we talk?” I ask, my voice quiet as I wait to see if she will engage with me. I don’t deserve anything from her, I know that, but by God do I want anything she’ll chuck my way.
It’s crazy how feelings I thought I had buried long ago have all come racing to the surface, along with an added dose of confusion and, dare I say, jealousy.
“We have nothing to say to one another,” she says, still keeping her back to me.
“I think we do,” I say, because of course we do. How can we just ignore the fact that she was in my son’s apartment? We can’t, and if they are a ‘thing’ then we need to get this over and done with, because I can’t give up on my son. I will get through to him if it’s the last thing I ever do.
“This isn’t the right time or place,” she says, her head hanging a little lower. I hate that she seems to be so uncomfortable around me. It makes me feel like even more of a jerk than I already do.
“There will never be a right time to discuss you dating my son,” I tell her, and that seems to be the switch as she whirls around, her hair nearly whipping me in the face as she does. I watch as her hands land on her hips and her eyes finally connect with mine.
“It’s none of your business,” she says, but even I can see she doesn’t believe that.
“It is every bit my business,” I tell her. “Not to mention awkward.”
I see her jaw clench, her eyes sparking with anger and defiance. “Look, this is a bit of a mindfuck for both of us, so why don’t we just leave it be until I’ve wrapped my head around the fact that you’re Danny’s dad.”
With that, she spins on her heel and starts to walk away.
I want to stop her. I want to talk to her more, because those few minutes weren’t enough—and maybe they never will be enough, because I already feel like she’s going to become my obsession all over again. But even as I watch her go, I can’t help but shout out to her, “Good to see you again, Cam.”
Her step falters slightly before she turns and flips me the bird. And I fucking smile.
Cameron Curtis might just be my biggest weakness, but even with the clusterfuck we’re about to find ourselves in, I can still admit that it feels so fucking good to have her back in my life, if only for a little while.
ChapterSix
Cameron
“So fucking good,” he says, right before he buries his tongue in my pussy. I arch my back and open my legs wider, crying out loud as he feasts on me.
I’ve had a few sexual encounters, but nothing like this. This is just fucking mind-blowing, and I don’t think I will ever recover from the way this man’s tongue assaults me. I crave him like a drug. Like I need my next breath. Like my world will end if he ever stops.
“Ah,” I moan, my hand going to the back of his head and gripping his hair. He growls and puts his hands underneath my arse, lifting me up, allowing his tongue to plunge a little deeper. He eats me until I scream his name. He fucks me from behind whilst I struggle to hold up my trembling limbs. He devours every inch of my skin, licking, tasting, sucking. His dick is a thing of beauty as he moves faster, his release rocketing into me as I push my arse back into him. And then we collapse on the bed, his body covering mine, and I pray that this will never end, because now I’ve experienced whatever the hell it is we’re doing here, I never want it to stop…
But it did stop, and I can’t fucking do this. It’s been on repeat in my head since I walked away from Caleb. The emotions are like a fucking hurricane inside of me, ranging from hurt to anger, pain and heartache, and then right back to want and need. And then there’s that smile he gave me when I flipped him off. Oh that fucking smile. Even with the bizarre situation I’ve found myself in, that smile still made me want to forget about it all and run right to him.
It’s going to be way too awkward to carry on the relationship I have with Danny, and at this point, I don’t even think friendship is a good idea, because I can’t run the risk of being in the same room as Caleb too often. I know they don’t get along right now, but they’re father and son, and at some point, they’ll probably patch things up and then I’ll be expected to be there for meals, get-togethers, fucking Christmas, the whole shebang. Nope. Can’t do it. Don’t want to do it. And also don’t want to run the risk of being unable to control the desire that still flows through me for the guy that was my first love.
Because that is what Caleb was, even if I never told him so.
My first and only love to this day, and I have no idea how I would get past that.
So, even with all of the snacks I bought for me and Danny to eat whilst we chill and watch films, I already know that I’m not going to be eating any of it, because I’m going to have to break up with him and end this before anyone gets really hurt.
I take a deep breath as I march along the pavement, determination to stop this before it begins coursing through me.
“I’ve got this,” I whisper to myself until I reach Danny’s apartment door and push it open. I stopped knocking about a week ago, already so comfortable around him… it’s a shame really, because this could have become something wonderful. But I push that thought away, otherwise I’ll chicken out.
“I got the snacks,” I call out as I make my way to the kitchen and put the shopping bag on the side. I have no idea why I lead with this, like we’re going to still have that relaxing afternoon, but I am also way out of my fucking depth here. I need to just tell him I’m not feeling this between us and go. Simple.
But then I feel his arm snaking around my waist from behind as he pulls me back to him, and I momentarily lose my trail of thought when his lips find the side of my neck and he peppers light kisses along my skin.
“Um…” My words trail off as his teeth find my earlobe and nip gently. His tongue licks along the shell of my ear, his hands moving to the underside of my breasts, and his dick poking into the bottom of my spine.