* * *
Pulling up outside Dylan’s house, I let the car idle for a few minutes before turning off the engine. Getting into it with my dad just dredged up all those memories I’ve tried to keep at bay all these years. Not because I forgot my sister or pushed myself to move on. I will never forget Lily. She’s a part of me, always will be, but it hurts so fucking much and sometimes the only way to survive is to continuously remind yourself to put one foot in front of the other. One breath at a time.
The sound of a car door slamming has me glancing over to Ash and Marcella’s house. Ash stands beside Porter’s car, flipping him off and shouting inaudibly. I climb out just as he does.
“What part of no don’t you understand, Porter? What the hell is wrong with you?”
That fucking asshole. Before I have time to think about my actions, I’m across the fence and have Porter pinned to the side of his car.
“Ryder? What the fuck?” He huffs out. My arm pins him by the neck, and no matter how hard he tries to push me, I’m a fucking solid wall.
“You touched her! You’re dead, man! Fucking dead!”
“Ryder, stop it!” Ash tugs on the sleeve of my jacket. “Stop it!”
I step away from Porter, but I’m not done with him. He bends at the waist, coughing.
Ash steps between us. “What is wrong with you? Let him go, Ryder.”
“I heard you telling him you said ‘no’.”
“Yes! I said no to publishing my story in a journal, asshole.”
I let go of Porter, who struggles to stand upright. I run my hands through my hair, tugging at the strands.
“You’re crazy, man,” Porter says. “What’s it to you, anyway? You basically bribed me to go out with her.”
My gaze settles on Ash. She frowns. “You did what?”
“It wasn’t like that, Ash…”
“Yeah. It was.” Porter rubs it in. “He wanted me to go out with you and break your heart or some shit like that.”
She scoffs. “You know what? You’re both fucking kids. Kids.”
She turns and walks toward her house.
“Ash, wait. I didn’t—”
She halts her steps, then spins on her heel. “You didn’t what, Ryder? Wanna hurt me? Destroy me. Isn’t that what you said you’d do, right? Too bad it’ll take a lot more than some asshole dumping me to do that.”
She climbs the stairs two at a time and slams her front door, leaving Porter and me on her front lawn.
ChapterNine
ASH
My mom used to say that heartbreak is proof you have one. I don’t know if that’s a good thing because when my parents died, for a long time, I wished I had died too when my heart shattered.
“You’re not playing hooky for two days in a row. Up with you, Asher Hawthorne.” My aunt lies beside me. I wonder for the first time in two days if I smell as bad as I think.
“Can’t I go to night school? Or maybe I don’t need college at all,” I mumble.
“Because of two immature little assholes? I think not, missy. Brooks women are many things, but doormats we are not.” My aunt never married, so she uses her and my mom’s maiden name.
I turn toward her, and she smooths out my nest of hair. “I feel so stupid. I thought Porter liked me, but not just that, he was a friend. Then there’s Ryder. Why do I even care?”
“They’re young men, Ash. Their heads are so far up their asses they can’t see what’s in front of them. But it’s their loss, and you’re not gonna give up on your dreams or your hygiene because of them.” Felicity scrunches her nose. “And if that boy doesn’t get off my lawn, I might have to call the cops.”