“Whenever someone would diss me or try to start something, I’d just force-feed them these laxatives. You know I got jacked at the prison gym, right? So it wasn’t too hard to force their mouths open, and then you just pinch their noses until they have to swallow.”
Both Cleo and I pause at this description of violence. Holy shit. But Jeannie continues, unbothered.
“It was perfect. My ju-ju is the magic stuff, and within five minutes those bitches would be screaming while shitting themselves. That shit was brown, gooey, and honestly, like a toxic vomit that would spray out of their buttholes in projectile fashion. They learned not to fuck around with me after that,” she adds with a satisfied smirk.
“Holy shit,” I growl, shaking my head.
“Didn’t you get into trouble for that?” Cleo asks with disbelief, furrowing her brow.
“Of course not,” Jeannie shrugs airily. “Taking a shit isn’t exactly a crime, even if you’re screaming like a stuck pig while doing it,” she adds with humor. “Besides, the guards didn’t care because it’s not like they’re the ones cleaning up. So yeah. It was usually the projectile shitter herself who had to clean up her own mess, and trust me, that’s not a job you want on your plate.”
This is getting so disgusting that I’m actually starting to feel nauseated. I push my food away, my stomach turning. Evidently, Cleo agrees because she too stops eating.
“Wow,” the curvy girl murmurs. “Gross.”
Jeannie nods. “Yeah, it’s perfect right? Projectile shitting is da bomb. I swear, I should market this stuff and sell it because it’s so powerful,” she says, looking craftily at the vial. “It’s like a magic potion.”
Cleo and I sit there, trying to take in everything that’s just happened. I guess we should have expected it, but no one expects their mother to get out of prison knowing how to cook laxatives. Meth maybe, but not laxatives.
Still, Jeannie’s already moved on and slips the vial back into her pocket before shooting us a devilish look.
“So how long have you two been dating?” she asks in a casual tone. “Since before I went in, or after?”
Once again, the two of us are left stunned. Cleo’s mouth falls open and I try to stutter out a few words of denial, but I don’t even know what to say because if Jeannie wasn’t sure of us dating before, then she must benowafter seeing our reactions.
“We—we aren’t—” I begin.
“Cut it out,” the older woman rolls her eyes. “Come on, I’m not blind or dumb. You two are practically glued to each other and you look at her the same way you used to look at me. Any idiot can see that you guys are together.”
“Jeannie—” I try, but she cuts me off.
“And stop looking so scared. I don’t care that you two are boinking one another. After all, what’s it to me?”
“You don’t mind?” Cleo whispers, her cheeks bright red as she hangs her head in an attempt to hide her face with her hair. “I mean, that is, if weweredating…” she tries to cover her tracks. “You really wouldn’t care?”
Jeannie just looks exasperated now, folding her hands over one another.
“Brody and I haven’t been married for more than a decade,” she huffs, sending us both a meaningful look. “It’s been a long time since I’ve wanted to be with him, and frankly, I’ve moved on.”
“What do you mean, you’ve moved on?” I ask slowly.
“It just means that being at Lockwood awakened something in my soul,” Jeannie hums. “An attraction for the female form, so to say, and trust me, hon, after you’ve had another woman go down on you, you’ll never go back. Women understand one another,” she adds in a sly tone. “As a result, cunnilingus is so much more satisfying.”
Cleo and I stare at one another again, our mouths hanging open. Holy shit, is Jeannie a lesbian now? It definitely sounds like it.
“More power to you,” I growl. “Good for you.”
“Yes, good for you,” Cleo echoes in a faint voice. “Did you find a girlfriend in prison?”
“Oh no,” Jeannie says airily. “One of those bitches? Please, I was using them for physical satisfaction, and nothing else. But yeah, like I said, I’ve moved on. Besides, I’m a strong believer in ‘you can’t pick whom you fall in love with’ because look at me. The universe works in strange ways, no? Sometimes, it awakens taboo desires, and you have to roll with it.”
“I see,” Cleo murmurs, shooting me a wary look. “Very interesting.”
“Besides, I can sense the spark between you two,” Jeannie continues with a mischievous grin. “Seems like you both really like each other.”
“Well, it’s only been a few months since we first got together but we’re really happy. At least I know I am,” Cleo smiles at me. “I’ve never been happier, actually.”
“Me too,” I growl, a flush rising on my cheekbones. “You’re beautiful and gorgeous, Cleo, and everything I’ve ever wanted.” Then my voice falters as I quickly glance at Jeannie. I hope she doesn’t feel insulted because hell, this is my ex, so maybe she’ll be resentful despite the change in her sexual orientation. But I have to be honest. I’ve never been so in love with a woman before in my life, but yeah, Cleo just happens to be my ex-wife’s daughter.