Marcella shrugged. “Dishonorable, I don’t know. I assume Cressida more than happily jumped into bed with you.”
“She did. No convincing necessary.”
“Then it’s her problem that she lost her V card before marriage. But your actions still were stupid. There’s a reason why most Made Men sleep with Outsiders before marriage to avoid this mess.”
The thought of being stuck with her was horrid. I supposed we’d just have a marriage on paper. “Marrying Cressida has its advantages. I don’t give a fuck about her feelings so I can keep fucking whoever I want even when we’re married.”
Marcella sighed. “You’re going to make an even worse mess, I can feel it deep down.”
“Says the girl who brought a biker home with her.”
She got up and punched my shoulder. But she knew I was right. Nothing I could do could possibly cause a bigger scandal than the one she had caused.
A month later our families met for dinner to finalize the details of our bond. Marcella had found a feeble excuse not to be present. I wished I could have done the same. She was probably banging Maddox on his bike while I had to bear Cressida’s smug face.
After dinner, I got up with a forced smile. “I’d like to show Cressida around.”
Her mother pursed her lips with overdone worry. “You’re not even engaged yet.”
Her father didn’t seem quite as concerned about me being alone with Cressida. I’d already popped her cherry, which was why we were here in the first place. He nodded benevolently, almost making me punch him. Cressida got up with a played shy smile. She put her hand on my arm and giggled as I led her out. I didn’t speak until we reached the library, then I dropped my arm and the chivalrous act.
“Amo, what’s the matter?” she asked as if she didn’t know it.
“Cut the act. You know I can’t stand you. Do you really want to base a marriage on that?”
Cressida shrugged. “I don’t care. You’ll change your mind about me once you get to know me better.”
I seriously doubted it. She’d talked shit about my sister in one of the hardest times of my sister’s life. She treated everyone she deemed less like shit and she was conceited as fuck. “Find a guy who buys into your bullshit and who worships the ground you walk on because that’s not going to be me.”
Her expression pinched but then she smiled sweetly and came closer, touched my chest.
“I gave you a gift, my virginity, doesn’t that count for something?”
“I’d give it back if I could,” I growled. I didn’t care if saying it was dishonorable too. I was a Made Man, not a British gentleman.
She flushed. “But you can’t. You dishonored me. You’re lucky nobody but my family knows yet. It would cast a bad light on you.”
“And you,” I said. But she had a point. While it wouldn’t ruin me, it would stir up a lot of bad blood and would make many Traditionalists demand that I didn’t become Capo.
She pressed up to me again, her lower lip jutting out. “Don’t be like that, Amo. I know we’ll have fun.” I gritted my teeth. She sank down to her knees right in the library and pulled down my fly. I shook my head, unable to believe she was going to blow me with our families down the hall. I was all for interesting places but not when my mother could potentially walk in.
She pulled my cock out, which was hardening despite my dislike of her. She giggled again and licked her lips.
My annoyance won over my hormones and I grabbed her hand, pulling her to her feet. Confusion flickered across her face. “You can’t expect me to dishonor you again.” My voice dripped with sarcasm.
She shrugged as I shoved my cock back into my pants and pulled up my fly.
“Your loss.”
I chuckled, shaking my head. “Cressida, I didn’t say I’d become a monk. That I won’t touch you until we’re married because I don’t see a fucking reason why, doesn’t mean I won’t fuck all the other women that throw themselves at me.”
“I could do the same, you know? Let other guys have me.”
I didn’t say anything, only looked at her daringly. She’d make me the greatest fucking gift of all time if she let a guy fuck her before I officially put my ring on her. Then I’d be free of her.
Six years later
I stifled a groan when I glanced down at my phone.