“It was. You threw up so much when you were pregnant with Giulio and you told me your first pregnancy with Nevio and me was incredibly hard on your body.”
“It doesn’t matter. Let me give you this gift, okay? Nothing’s worse than seeing your child suffer. Trust me, I want nothing more than to give you the chance to become a mother yourself, and you can experience the pregnancy through me, can be there when I give birth.”
“You really thought it through.”
I was completely overwhelmed. I hadn’t spared another thought on children, hadn’t dared to do so. I’d focused on walking and maybe dancing again, because that was something in my grasp.
“You don’t have to decide today, or tomorrow, or even next year. Just know that I want to do this for you.”
I threw my arms around her. “I can’t think right now. Thank you, Mom. Thank you so much.”
It was the day before Christmas and I was practicing walking with my crutches under Kiara’s watchful eyes in Mom’s yoga room again when Nevio stepped into the room. Surprise washed over me. I hadn’t expected them to be back again.
Nevio stuffed his hands into the pockets of his black cargo pants, hovering in the doorway. He had avoided talking to me since the attack. I had heard only figments of what had gone down in New York. Nevio looked as he always did when he was with me, not like the monster he let out more and more.
“Can you give us a moment?” he asked. Kiara nodded. She touched his arm briefly as she walked past him.
I resisted the urge to ask where Amo was. Nevio obviously wanted to be alone with me, and he deserved my full attention. He wasn’t used to sharing it.
“Won’t you come closer?” I asked.
Nevio strode toward me, his eyes lingering on my cast before he met my gaze. “I know you don’t want to hear it but I killed everyone who did this to you. I poured all of my rage into it. For you.”
I smiled and released my crutches to hug him. Nevio quickly wrapped his arms around me, obviously worried I’d fall. “I know that’s how you show me your love.”
“You’re really going to leave Las Vegas?”
I peered up into his haunted eyes. “I have to follow my heart. We can see each other all the time now that there won’t be war anymore.”
“It’s not the same. You’ll have a new family.”
I let out a tight laugh, though I felt more like crying. “I’ll never replace you and our family. And creating my own family won’t be so easy.” I touched the bandage over my abdomen that was hidden by my wide dress.
Nevio’s mouth twisted. “Fuck, Greta, that’s not what I meant. I wish I could do something.”
“Don’t let the dark swallow you just because I’m not there to watch over you. One day you’ll find someone who’ll shine brightly.”
Nevio shook his head with a dark laugh. “I’ll try to dip my feet into the light on occasion, but don’t expect me to have feelings for anyone, Greta. Even if I hadn’t been averse to the idea of it before, seeing what your feelings for Vitiello did is a huge deterrence.”
I rolled my eyes.
“So you’re not mad at me?”
“I was never mad at you.”
“Really?”
He shrugged. “I’m raging mad at Vitiello.”
“Don’t be. I want you to try to get along.”
“You’re asking a lot from me.”
“I know. It could be my Christmas present.”
Nevio’s gaze slanted to the doorway. He must have heard steps because Amo stepped in a moment later. I gave him a weak smile, my heart filling with longing. After having spent two weeks together in hospital, being separated for several days had seemed like eternity, which was irrational considering we’d been apart longer than that before.
Nevio released me slowly. “Can you stand?”