Rather than clue me in, he elbows Colt. “Come on. We’ve got shit to do.” Strange, but I can almost feel the expectation in the air when Nix stares at me. “Well?” he demands.
“Well, what?”
“Don’t you want to know what I’m talking about?”
“Not really. Have fun, whatever it is.” But I don’t turn away, back to the laptop. I’m not turning my back on them.
“Come on. She’s not worth it.” Colt pulls Nix away, and once they’re in the hall, he mutters something that makes him laugh in a way that sends a chill down my spine. Are they planning something? Or do they only want me to think they are, so I sit here worrying myself half to death?
Psychological warfare. That’s what they are doing to me.
What they want most is for me to react, and I’m not going to give them that satisfaction if I can help it.
Instead, I’m going to sit here and wonder what Nix meant about things going differently once our parents get home. There’s still another ten days before that’s supposed to happen, and I’ve been secretly dreading them coming to an end. I don’t know what is going to happen with James or how things are going to change. Whether he’s going to go back to the way he was before, which I can only guess now, was all an act. The more time before I have to face him again, the better.
But I can’t imagine anything I’m doing right now that I couldn’t do once life goes back to normal. I’m making money and want to get out and take care of myself. What’s so wrong with that? No matter how I try to come up with a reason for somebody to get in the way, I can’t come up with anything.
Then again, I never imagined James doing what he did, either. Even now, it feels more like a nightmare than an actual memory. The way he changed so suddenly, going from the nice guy I thought I knew to someone dark and violent. It’s enough to make me worry about Mom, and that’s saying something. Very rarely do I worry about her since she doesn’t seem to care much about me unless it’s about the way I make her look or about the way I ruined her life. Has he ever treated her the way he treated me that day? I can’t imagine since why would she have married him?
The answer to that question is pretty simple, actually. Just looking around my bedroom is answer enough. It’s practically the size of half our old trailer. She’s been desperate to get out of that life. Is she desperate enough to marry a psychopath?
I stare out the window, lost in my worries. Wondering if my mother is somewhere alone with somebody who could suddenly lose his temper and do to her what he did to me…
CHAPTER 20
If I’m grateful for one thing, it’s my books. My only way of escaping for a little while. When I’m reading, I’m not worrying. I’m not dreading or remembering. I can exist in another world, someplace where things make sense. Where people don’t hurt each other for no reason, where they apologize for the things they’ve done—and if they don’t want to apologize, they end up paying for it in the end. I think that’s the part I like best. Knowing the bad guys are always going to get what’s coming to them.
Sadly, real life isn’t that simple. I certainly know that for a fact.
I’m so deep in my latest favorite read that the knock on my bedroom door startles me. I’ve been up here all day. Glad nobody has bothered me since that strange conversation earlier before the guys left the house. I took advantage of that at the time, going down to grab something to eat when nobody was around to bug me. That was hours ago, and now it’s dark outside the bedroom window. Time sometimes slips away when I’m deep in a story, and that clearly happened today.
My heart sinks as I slide back into reality. There’s another knock, louder this time. “Did you fall asleep in there?” Colt barks.
And if I did? Would that be a crime? “No. Just busy.”
“If you’re hungry, come on down. We brought dinner back.”
Immediately, I feel defensive. They brought dinner, and they’re going out of their way to get me to come down to eat with them? There’s got to be something else going on. “I’m not hungry right now.”
Since it doesn’t seem like he’s going to go anywhere, I get off the bed and go to the door. He’s wearing a pretty neutral expression when I look up at him, but I’m not fooled by that. “Come on,” he grunts. “It’s just dinner. Figured you might want to eat at a normal time instead of waiting until the middle of the night.”