I think for a moment, then ask, “Are you looking for my blessing, Kenzo?”
He doesn’t answer me immediately. He swims us to the side of the river where it’s shallower, and the current isn’t as strong. I can feel his feet touching and slipping on the muddy banks below.
“No,” he says, then he takes a deep breath. “Yeah… I don’t know. I guess I am.” He clears his throat. “Things are different on this side. Rachel practically fell through those gates into our ward. She surprised us. All the newbies normally show up within two or three days, not nine days later. And she was shot in the arm. She’s a tough one.”
I smile. I can hear his love for her shimmering through in his words. Maybe it’s because of everything I’ve been through, and I’m done judging people, but I can’t find it in my heart to be angry with him. My mother is a whole different story, though. Right now, I couldn’t care less about her.
“It was between Idris, me, and Warrick. I knew what a bastard Warrick was, and Idris wasn’t a better choice. I took her to protect her. She hated me for it.” He laughs. “She said those exact words to me you did, ‘I hate you, Kenzo,’ he mimics my mother and me. “I said the same thing to her that I told you; I never told her to love me, and that’s when I realized I wanted her. I wanted her to love me.” He sighs, and it sounds miserable.
“She’s changed a lot,” I whisper against his cheek.
“She has.” Our conversation stops as we approach the gleaming blue boundary marker of the ecocity.
“Take a deep breath, kid. We’re going under.”
Before I can ask him whether the force field will fry us to a crisp, I have to inhale deeply, and then we go under.
Nothing can beat the suffocating feeling of the water trying to claw my lungs from my chest. When we come up on the other side of the boundary line, my lungs are on fire, and I gasp for air.
“Your nails,” Kenzo gasps. “You’re digging my heart out, kid. Let up some.”
I ease up on the grip I have around his neck and chest.
We float a few more yards down the river before Kenzo takes us back to the riverbank. It’s muddy and slippery, and I keep slipping until Kenzo grabs my arm and yanks me forward and onto dry land.
“Christ, that was no party,” he grumbles.
“Thanks for doing all the hard work. At least we made it past the dome without being fried.” I glance around us at the trees and fields of wild grass. At least, what I can see in the dark. The ecocity is in the distance. “We need to get dry. The guns are wet. Do you think they’ll still work?”
“Yeah. I’ll have to check them, though.” He gestures to my backpack. “How many do you have?”
“I think four. I just shoved in as many clips as I could.”
Kenzo’s teeth reflect white under the light of the dome. It’s lighter on this side. The virtuous have never really seen the darkness of the night.
“And here I was hoping you gained a few pounds,” he chuckles. “In the meantime, my girl is packing some guns.” He ruffles my hair and droplets of water fall on my face. “The guns will work, wet or dry, but I see you won’t.” He looks around.
In the distance, the first lights of the virtuous dwellings dot in a straight line.
“We could go to my dad’s house,” I offer.
“Yeah, right.” He shakes his head. “Just imagine how that would go down.”
“He won’t be home. He works most of the time,” I reassure him. “We need to get dry.”
We stare at each other for a minute, and I will him to say yes. I’d love to see my childhood home again, and I’ll be able to get clothes there so I can blend in.
“Minutes, kid, we don’t stay longer than a few minutes,” he warns me.
We start jogging slowly, and it helps a little to chase the chill from my body.
“Wipe the grin off your face. If you’re hoping to see him, you better get rid of the hope now. He’s the one creating the very enemy we’re fighting.”
My grin fades. “Not if I can convince my father to come with us. Without him, they can’t make more insensates.”
“Sometimes people don’t want to be saved. Just prepare yourself for it.”
I nod, knowing I might not like what I find. I’m actually afraid Dad won’t want to come and that he’s really the enemy.
Reaching the first line of houses, we stick to the shadows as we creep in the direction of my family home. My teeth keep chattering from the wet clothes, but I keep pushing forward.