It does bring me a moment of comfort.
“How are you, Willow?”
“I’m doing okay. Just settling in.”
“Where’s my grandson?”
“He’s asleep, but he’ll be up later.”
She frowns. “Oh, well, do you have time for coffee?”
I stare over at Ava who nods and shrugs. I give a half smile. “Sure.”
I walk into the kitchen to turn the coffee machine on. My mother perches on a stool and smiles across at me.
“You look like you’re doing better.”
“Thanks, Mom, as do you,” I say, preparing a few cups.
“Where’s Jenny?”
“She went out, but she won’t be long.”
“I met that man she’s seeing the other day.”
“Oh, Ace?”
“Yes, he’s ... interesting.”
I can’t help but grin at the look on her face. She looks mortified, but also curious.
“He’s a good guy,” I tell her. “He’s good to her.”
“He’s very rough, I don’t want her to end up in the same situation as you.”
Ouch. That one hits so hard it almost buckles my knees.
“And what situation is that?” I say, voice hoarse.
She stares at me wide eyed. “Willow, you’re not exactly in a good situation right now, and it’s only because you met Jagger.”
“It’s hardly Jagger’s fault.”
“Well ...”
“Don’t, Mom, you don’t know even half of the story. He’s a good man, and so is Ace, you can’t choose who we date.”
“I just don’t want you to get hurt, those men are no good. There is something about them I don’t trust.”
“Because the man you chose was so much better.”
Her eyes widen, and I immediately regret my words. That was unfair, I know. Ava stares at me, slightly shocked. It was a low blow, I know it was, and I feel immediately bad about it.
“I’m sorry, that wasn’t fair.”
“You just want to punish me,” she says, her eyes filled with anger and hurt. “Don’t you?”
“No, of course not.”
“Then why are we always fighting? I’m trying to build a relationship with you, and you won’t let me.”
“I know, and I appreciate it. I do. But it’s so hard for me right now, I thought you of all people would understand.”
Her face hardens. “What’s that supposed to mean?”
“I don’t mean it like that,” I exhale. This is what always happens when we talk. “I mean that sometimes things are hard and we do things we wouldn’t usually.”
She looks away. “You’ll never forgive me, will you? I made a mistake, Willow, and I’ve paid for it every day since. I don’t know what I can say or do to make it better, but I’m trying, which is more than you can say for yourself.”
She stands and looks at Ava and me once more before storming out. I sigh and slump against the bench. Ava gets up, her face full of pity, no doubt for my mother and me. It doesn’t matter what we do, it always ends like this. I know it’s not all her fault; I have a giant wall up when it comes to her, and I struggle to break it down. I can do better, I know I can.
“Willow, honey, isn’t it time to let go? You two can’t go on forever fighting like that.”
I sigh. “I’m trying, Ava, but it’s so hard. I know I need to do better, I will do better.”
Ava pats my hand. “Right now, things are hard. Everything will get better soon. Don’t beat yourself up about it.”
“I hope you’re right.”
We both sit down in silence with our coffee, and a moment later a knock sounds out at the back door. Ava gets up and walks over, opening it to see Angel. He grins and leans forward, kissing her softly, then smiles over at me.
“Hey, Angel, what’s up?”
“Have you got a minute?”
I narrow my eyes. “Is everything okay?”
“Sure, where’s Jen?”
Why does he want to know where Jenny is?
“She’s out at the moment, why?”
He nods his head toward the park over the road. “Come and find out for yourself. Be warned, it’ll shock you.”
Ava and I exchange confused glances, and I quickly go and lift Cody from his crib into the stroller. He stirs a little but quickly falls back to sleep. We follow Angel towards the park, and I see Ace sitting beside a man on the park bench. I skid to a halt when I take note of him. I vaguely remember his face, but I’m sure he didn’t look like this before. It’s Officer Huck, I know that much. I stare at him, really taking him in.
I’m in shock.
How did I not notice this before?
Maybe because I don’t remember him that well from the first time I saw him.
I was younger.
I was going through something.
It just didn’t seem obvious.
Cody begins to stir and numbly I lean down and pull him into my arms. Ace is beside me in minutes, taking him and steadying me when I sway a little. This is too much.
“Did you know about this?” I whisper.