“You’re right,” I say, breathlessly leaning closer. “I want to fuck you so bad that I’m standing here, wet. I want nothing more than for your mouth to go between my legs and lick until I’m screaming your name. I want your cock so deep inside me I forget any other man. I want all of those things, Jagger, but I’m not going to give them to you because you have a wife, and I’m nobody’s seconds.”
His face is tight as he presses himself against me. I can feel the hard length of his cock rubbing against my stomach. “Are you fucking him?”
I shrug, running a finger down his chest. “Are you fucking her?”
His eyes flash.
I push him back.
“You don’t get to decide who I fuck and who I don’t, if you want me, Jagger, you know what you have to do.”
With that, I turn and saunter off.
God damn, I’m proud of myself.
That was, without a doubt, the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do.
THE NIGHT CONTINUES on, and oh, it’s one of the best nights I’ve ever had.
Mostly, because Jagger hasn’t taken his eyes off me.
He wants me, I know he wants me, but he’s not going to admit it.
He has a choice to make, and I’m not giving him a single thing more until he makes that choice.
Luca and I jump up onto the back of Angel’s truck and begin dancing together, laughing and swinging each other around. As we grow even more drunk, his hands get a little more confident, and he begins gripping my hips, pulling me closer and swaying me until we’re pressed together. It feels nice, to be wanted.
I close my eyes, swaying to the music, when suddenly Luca is being ripped away from me. My eyes snap open, and I see Jagger on the back of the truck, his chest rising and falling as he pants angrily, Luca’s shirt in his fist as he hauls him closer. “Get your fuckin’ hands off her.”
“Jagger!” I shout, stepping up and forcing him to release Luca. “What the hell are you doing?”
He looks at me in a way that has my heart breaking into a thousand tiny pieces.
He jumps down off the truck and disappears down the road, and I know I shouldn’t, I know I should just walk away, but I can’t.
I jump down and run off into the darkness after him.
When I reach him, I grip his arm, and he spins around, angrily barking, “Do not fuckin’ follow me.”
“You don’t get to be angry, Jagger,” I say, panting. “You made this choice. You decided you didn’t want me, not the other way around. I’m allowed to move on.”
“I didn’t fucking decide,” he roars, “I didn’t even get a fucking chance to think. That woman came back, from the dead, and she is my wife. She’s my fucking wife. What would you have me do?”
I swallow, tears welling in my eyes. “I know that!” I yell back. “I know she’s your wife.”
“If you think that means I don’t want you, you’re so fuckin’ wrong. You’re all I want, Willow. It’s fuckin’ destroying me. I fuckin’ want you so bad. I know it’s wrong, I know I should be doing right by her, but I can’t take it anymore. I can’t fuckin’ take it.”
I step closer to him, chest rising and falling. “I’m yours if you want me, I always have been.”
He stares down at me, face tight, fists clenched. “I can’t win.”
I press a hand to his chest. “Jagger ...”
He curls his fingers around my hand, squeezing. “I need you. But I can’t ... I ... fuck.”
God damn him.
God damn this.
I need him, too.
“I can’t be your second choice.”
“You were never my second choice,” he growls, hooking an arm around my waist and pulling me close. “Tell me to leave, Willow. I don’t have the strength to do it myself.”
“Please,” I breathe. “I can’t say no. Not again. Don’t make me say no.”
“Do you know how fuckin’ hard I am right now? Do you know what I want to do to you, Willow?”
He trails his fingers down my dress and up my thigh, sliding across until he finds my damp panties.
I should stop him.
I know I should.
But I don’t want to.
I’m pathetic. I’m weak. I couldn’t even hold to my promise to myself for one god damned night.
“Damp, I knew they would be. Admit it, you want me inside you as much as I want to be there.”
“Please,” I try again, pitifully.
He slides his finger underneath my panties and finds my pussy. The moment I feel his flesh graze across mine, I lose all control. He growls and shoves my legs apart, pushing his finger inside me while teasing my clit with his thumb. He’s forward, there’s no gentle caresses tonight. We’re both desperate. Both hungry. Both wanting.