I looked over my shoulder to see Samantha.
“What are you doing here?” I asked. “Is your brother running late again?”
“Always.” She sighed. “Why are you sad?”
“Sad?” I asked, but she gave me a look that told me there was no getting out of this one. The students all could see it, and she was the only one who felt she could ask me about it.
“Sad,” I repeated. “Right. Well, you know that boy I liked? We decided it wasn’t going to work out for us to be together, and that makes me sad.”
“Why?”
“I think he’s going to move far away, and I think I’m going to stay here. I like to be by my mom,” I said. It was the only thing I could think of in the moment, and she seemed to take it.
“I’m sorry he made you sad. If he comes in here, I’m going to tell him he has to answer to me now. I told him to make sure you were happy, and he’s the one who made you sad, so I’m going to have to kick his butt!” she said.
“Whoa now.” I smiled. “Let’s be careful not to be naughty. I’m sad right now, but we don’t have to do anything that’s going to make us even more sad, and if I did something that made him sad, I would be even more sad.”
“I guess that makes sense,” Samantha said.
“But what about you and Bobby?” I wanted to change the subject away from my dating life to talk about what she was doing with her friend.
“I’m pretty sure we’re going to get married,” she said. “He said he was going to the store with his mom this week, and he’s going to ask her to get me a ring pop.”
“That’s really special,” I told her.
“Thank you. I’ll let you see it if she says I can have one,” Samantha said. “Bye, Miss Dennis. I hope you aren’t sad anymore!”
“Thank you,” I said with a smile.
I watched through the window as Samantha ran outside to meet her brother, then I grabbed my bag and jacket and headed out the door myself. Other teachers were making their way to their vehicles in the parking lot, but I was surprised to find Trevor of all people standing outside of his car next to mine.
I gave him an inquisitive look.
“Do you want to go to dinner?” he asked. “I’m sorry, I really wanted to talk to you and didn’t want to do it over the phone or anything. It’s a little early, but maybe that means we’re not going to get stuck waiting for hours anywhere. What do you say?”
“Sure.” I shrugged.
I wasn’t sure it was a good idea to go have dinner with him, but also, what was the harm in that? We might get more accomplished if we talked to each other when we were calm rather than having a shouting match at each other, and if we were going to split up, I would much rather it was when we were calm and collected rather than when we were worked up and fighting.
“There’s a place I know, I think you’ll like,” he said. “I’ll drive.”
“Okay,” I said and got into the passenger seat of his car. I wasn’t sure what to say and was having a tough time ignoring the awkward tension between us, but I was pushing myself to go through with this.
It might just be the final time the two of us say goodbye to each other, or it might make us able to have a friendship moving forward.
I decided to go into the dinner without any expectations at all. I wanted the chance to talk to him, and Raya thought it would be a good idea for the two of us to talk, so this could be that closure I was needing to move on with my life. I didn’t know, but I was going through with this impulse anyway.
If anything, it was getting dinner out of the deal, and if Trevor was there, I might find enough of an appetite to eat something.
There could be some silver lining.
THIRTY-SEVEN
Trevor
I keptthe conversation casual on our way to the restaurant.
There were so many things I wanted to say to her, but I wanted to have her full attention, and I wanted to be sitting down in the restaurant when I had it. There was too much going on when trying to drive through the streets of New York City. It was far easier just to make small talk in the car and save the important shit for later.