“Easy. An Olympic swimmer.” Tam starts to move her arms like she’s doing the freestyle stroke.
“Ever since she watched the Paralympics and saw Jessica Long, she wants to be a competitive swimmer,” Marnie explains.
“She’s my hero.”
I marvel even more at this girl. “Excellent hero.”
“Of course, Daddy is really my hero because he fights fires and saves people.”
“Even better hero,” I agree.
“What did you want to be when you grew up? Did you always want to run a store?” Tam asks all innocent, like I’m not already a grown up.
“I did want to run a store. Only a store that I owned. A bookstore maybe. Or a store that sells lotions and bubble baths. Or a boutique.”
“You could have a store that sells all those things,” she encourages.
“I could. When I finally grow up.”
Marnie laughs. “Aren’t we all waiting on that to happen for us?”
“Did you want to be a mom when you grew up? Daddy says you don’t have any kids. I want to be a mom one day.”
“Well . . . I . . .”
“Tam, remember what we talked about. Some questions are rude.” Marnie levels Tam with a gentle rebuff.
“It’s okay. I did want to be a mom. I mean, I still do, maybe one day.” I’m not about to explain that becoming a mom, involves having a man, which I haven’t had in years.
We switch topics again and dig into mini-sandwiches and cut-up veggies with a variety of dips.
Dessert is served.
“My favorite is the chocolate mousse with the Christmas tree cookie on top,” I explain. The tree looks like it’s potted in the mousse and the mousse has cookie crumbs on top to give the effect of dirt.
As dessert winds down, there’s a call for everyone’s attention to one corner of the dining room where a variety of young actors, who look like Doll and Me girls, gather to perform holiday songs from various cultures.
Tam asks if she can go closer to the corner and Marnie gives her permission. We can see Tam where she decides to sit on the floor with the other kids.
“I messed up telling her about my mom, didn’t I?”
Marnie places her arm on the table and leans forward. “The truth doesn’t hurt her. She might not need to know all the details but it’s good for her to know that others have misfortunes and life goes on.”
“Christmas is just difficult.”
Marnie nods. Then chews her lips. “Look, I don’t want to feel like I’m tooting my brother’s horn. God knows, both of them have heads bigger than that tree.” She hitches her thumb at the Christmas tree. “But Zebb really is a good guy. He hasn’t been with a woman in a long time. He messed up by not calling you when Tam was sick.” Marnie softens her voice. “He’s never brought someone to the house to meet Tam before. I should know, I lived there her first three years. He wasn’t keeping her a secret. He’s just protective. He wants her to have the best life, everything as normal as can be, whatever normal might mean anymore. He doesn’t want women coming and going from her life.”
“I get that.” I swipe my hair behind one ear. I hear what she’s saying, and I understand.
“But what you might be missing is, he brought you to his house. He introduced you to Tam. He let her come here, although he might not have been able to stop her.” Marnie laughs as she checks on Tam across the room. “I’m just saying you must be special to him.”
I tilt my head, stupid tears blurring my eyes. “He’s special to me.”
Marnie smiles, giving me a reassuring nod. Then, we both turn our attention to the performance.
My mind races with all she’s said but I can’t decipher what any of it means. If I’m special, I still don’t understand why he didn’t call. But then again, I didn’t explain to him I wasn’t actually on a date.
Perhaps we need to give each other a pass on this bump in the road.