And I often overdid it.
Still, the month since I’d taken a bullet to protect my daughter had given me plenty of time to get back to myself. I’d lucked out that the bullet hadn’t hit anything vital. Blood loss had been the biggest issue, but a transfusion at the hospital had fixed that.
I couldn’t move quite as fast as I could before, the muscles still knitting back together as I worked at not allowing anything to atrophy. I’d gotten injured enough over the years to know myself, to know how far I could push my body as it recovered.Though, I did miss being younger, back when I healed so much faster.
A soft knock drew my attention to the door. The way my chest tightened made me sigh. Would I never stop reacting this way? It had been ten years since I’d first met Sasha, and she still did this to me.
“Come in,” I called.
The door opened, and Sasha stepped inside. She wore clothing that fit her style—a pair of gray slacks and a white button-up shirt tucked in. A long silver necklace hung, the pendant hidden beneath her shirt. Her curly blonde hair was pulled into a bun. Her makeup was subtle, as usual, with only a light sparkle on her lids and some mascara. It was one of the things that drew me to her, how simply she dressed, how natural she appeared, how honest she was.
Which was strange. The other love of my life—
I cut that thought off before it got far.
When she caught sight of me, a timid smile broke out over her pink lips. She was the only person in the world who smiled when she saw me. Maybe that was part of my obsession, some selfish piece of me that enjoyed our interactions, that liked how she didn’t fear me.
She had no idea who or what I really was, which was the only reason she could relax like this around me. If she knew…
If she knew, she’d never willingly stand in the same room as me again.
“You look good,” she said as she shut the door behind her.
“I heal fast. Call it one of my few redeeming qualities.”
“I don’t know if I’d say few,” she answered before setting her crossbody bag on the table. She glanced around the room, then furrowed her eyebrows. “What is this place?”
“It’s a doctor’s office. The doctor is on vacation this week, which left it empty. I thought this was a good place for the final check-up, in case you needed anything.”
“Do they know we’re here?” She worried her bottom lip with her teeth, as if the idea of breaking and entering disturbed her.
“Of course they do. I paid the office manager for the use of it.”
She let out a soft, relieved breath.
It reminded me just how innocent she was, how different. The women in my life tended toward vicious. They were tough, terrifying and more than willing to backstab anyone they needed to.
Sasha was, instead, a breath of fresh air in my stale world. She was kind, honest and caring. She epitomized everything I wasn’t.
“Are you okay?”
Her question made me stand up straight, realizing I’d stared at her without intending to long enough that I’d made her uncomfortable. I scolded myself for my rare lapse of focus. “Sorry,” I offered to defuse the tension, then reached for the folder I’d left on the exam table and handed it to her. “Here are the X-rays, the report from the radiologist and the blood tests. They were all done four days ago, so it should give you everything you need.”
Sasha stared at me as if weighing my words for truth. After a moment, she took the file. I doubted she believed me fully, but rather realized I wouldn’t answer even if she asked more.
She flipped through the pages, skimming her simply painted nails over the words. “Your bloodwork looks good. Your vitamin B levels are low, and your magnesium is borderline. I’d suggest supplementing those. In six months, have another test run to make sure the levels are where they should be.”
I nodded and leaned against the exam table. I ate fairly well—taking care of my body allowed me to stay sharp—but I didn’t doubt there were things I could do better.
She moved from the blood test to the X-rays. Her competency impressed as always. Beauty didn’t get people far with me, but being talented? That got me. She only glanced at the actual images before switching to the report. “Everything looks good here. Your healing is on track. Honestly, it is amazing that you’ve come this far so fast. I guess it shows you take good care of yourself.” She lifted her gaze from the files to me, a heat in her blue eyes that made me swallow.
I knew exactly how this would go if I allowed it. All I had to do was cross that distance, was to pull her against me, and she’d give in.
She’d do more than give in—she’d respond in kind. She’d kiss me back, let me touch her all I wanted. I could shake this emptiness inside me, perhaps forget about it for a short while.
But…that wasn’t fair to her. I couldn’t expose her to me, to the ugliness of my life, my past, all for a few hours of selfish pleasure.
So instead, I answered with a flat tone to drown the desire between us. “I guess I have good genes.”