I recognized the sensation. I even heard a dark growl, and a whispered,minein my head.
The girl yanked backward, shifting back to her human form as if startled. “What was that?” She stared at me as if I’d done something, as if I had suddenly become dangerous. “You’re already bound, aren’t you?”
I nodded as I realized what she meant.
“So there is another like me? I’m not alone?”
“His name is Kit,” I told her. “He’s just like you are.”
“But you aren’t a toy. Why would he bind you but not make you into a toy?”
“He bound me to protect me,” I explained.
“But why not consume you? Why help you but allow you to go about on your own? It makes no sense…”
I didn’t know how to answer her, but I had to try. “If I were a toy, I couldn’t talk to him. He’d be alone again.”
She frowned, but seemed to be unwilling to break eye contact, as if afraid to look away. “I could break that bond, you know? He’s powerful, much more powerful than I am, but he isn’t here. I could consume everything inside you, turn you into a shell, and snap the bond you have to him, make you mine.” After that, she lowered her voice, again seeming to speak to herself. “But then he might come after me. I couldn’t stand against him, not from what I felt, and so if I damage his toy, he might kill me.” She pressed her lips together, as if arguing with herself. “Then again, maybe he’ll find me if I do… I could see another like me, and if I die? Maybe he’ll make me a toy and I won’t have to question or feel lonely anymore…”
I shook my head. “You don’t need to do that. I’ll tell him about you, then you can meet him. You don’t need to bind me.”
She tilted her head, looking almost like a confused dog. “I could break the bond, but that feels…wrong? Like a line I’m not supposed to cross. How strange. Is this old instinct? Something inside me that warns that I shouldn’t do that?” After a moment, she shook her head. “I will leave you as you are for now…”
“Thank you,” I answered, amazed I could get anything out at all given how fast my heart raced.
“It usually takes a few times before toys lose all their fight, before all parts of them are consumed, so the guards won’t expect you to be like the others just yet. Still, keep this between us for now.”
I nodded. “Of course. I won’t say a word.”
“You said his name was Kit, right?” There was a question in those words, something beneath it where she wanted to know more but perhaps didn’t know what to ask.
“Yeah. He’s sort of like a teacher, helping other shades, teaching them to use their skills.”
“He helps people?”
“He taught me to use my powers, and he tries to protect whoever he can.” Saying that lifted a weight from me, made me realize the truth of it. Even if Kit made choices I didn’t agree with, even if he could be shady, even if he seemed like someone I couldn’t fully understand, he also did whatever he could to help others.
“I didn’t realize…” She paused, her expression tight as if she had trouble understanding something important. Then again, it seemed she thought she was alone in the world. Finding out she wasn’t would be a shock.
“I know when he finds out that there is another like him, he’ll be happy. No one wants to be alone, to be the only of their type, and he’s never met another like him.”
She gave me a slight smile, one full of hesitation. It almost made me wonder if she ever smiled, if she ever had anything to smile about. “I think I would like to meet him.” The smile fell. “Not that that is likely possible, I suppose. Though, life for us is long, so who knows? Now, it is time for you to go back.”
“And what happens next?”
“Shades require a few days; rest for each process to take effect. After that, you would be brought back to me for another pass. It takes anywhere from three to ten attempts to fully consume a shade’s being. The more powerful the shade, the more attempts it takes.”
“What will you do next time?”
“I don’t know yet. Perhaps I’ll let you go again, or perhaps I’ll realize it’s time to do as I’m commanded. I supposed we’ll only know when it happens.”
That response didn’t reassure me, but I understood it. It was all she could offer.
“We are done. You’ll return to your body, to the physical world, and they’ll take you back to your cell.”
“Wait. What’s your name? I didn’t get to ask.”
She blinked slowly, as if she hadn’t been asked that before. “They call me Corrander One.”