I didn’t deserve to be anywhere around her.
* * * *
Brax
I stared at the building that housed the generators. Getting outside wasn’t that hard for someone like me. I’d done enough tasks for Larkwood to have some favors to call in. It meant when I’d said I wanted some time outside to exercise and run, they’d allowed it.
Deacon watched me, which made the entire thing trickier. No doubt he’d volunteered for the task just to annoy me.
Or, rather, to keep a close eye on me.
The fact that Deacon and Hera had some connection didn’t fail to rile up my temper. What she saw in that asshole, I had no idea. He was the enemy. His job and life revolved around keeping us prisoner, so why the hell couldn’t she break off whatever they had between them?
Because she’s too fucking sweet for her own good.Hera didn’t see people for what they really were. She saw the best even when it wasn’t there.
Maybe I shouldn’t hate that about her, because that fault allowed her to accept me.
Deacon stood far away, having given me the full space behind the main building to exercise. Then again, he probably knew I wouldn’t try to escape.
At least not right then…
He knew I had Knox to think about, that I’d never abandon my brother. Hell, Larkwood used that like a card, knowing that so long as my twin remained, I’d never really try to escape.
It meant I had the chance to exercise, and each time I neared the small outside building where the generators sat, I took note of a bit more.
The exercise helped, though. I rarely got the chance to let go, to fall into the full strength of my own body. I usually had to hold back, to ensure I kept myself under control. I ran on a treadmill and lifted weights to leash it as best I could, but that wasn’t the same as really pushing my body to its limits outdoors.
The last time I’d been able to go all out, the last time I’d fully given myself over to my berserker had been amission a year prior, when they’d dropped me off somewhere—I had no idea where because they didn’t give me information I didn’t need—and immediately had taken a bullet to my shoulder.
Talk about a way to release my other side.Between the bullet and the drugs they’d pumped into me to hype up my adrenaline, I’d turned almost instantly. I still recalled sitting in the plane on the way back, covered in blood, a smile on my lips. No matter how much I hated losing control, it still gave me a sense of peace, like tension leaving me.
I shook my head and focused on my task rather than anything else.
I easily picked up the hum of the generators from inside. I stopped just beside the door and hid my interest by dropping to the dirt to do pushups.
I peered toward the building as I worked out, spotting the lock on the door. It was one like those in the building, which meant it opened with a properly programmed wristband that had access. So long as Wade could handle security, the door would unlock and the cameras would go down. That would mean I could enter the building without worrying about calling more guards there until I took out all the generators.
“You’re spending more time looking around than exercising.” Deacon’s voice came from closer than I expected, letting me know he’d approached while I surveyed the security measures around the building.
I didn’t let him shake me, though. It would take a lot more than Deacon to worry me. “This is all pretty easy exercise. I don’t need to focus much on it.” I offered him a dismissive look. “Not all of us get winded when running.”
He narrowed his eyes but didn’t rise to the jab. Then again, it was yet another thing that annoyed me about Deacon. He controlled his temper better than I ever could. Then again, he was a meta and not a shade. He didn’t have another thing inside him, driving him, altering his normal reactions. He was some twisted mix of human and shade, but he differed greatly from me.
“You know, if you get Hera killed…”
That brought me to a stop and made me rise to my feet and face him. “Aren’t you a little too worried about some female shade? Doesn’t seem appropriate given your job, does it?”
“I just don’t want to see her suffer because you want to use her.”
“That it? Because I don’t think she needs you watching over her.”She has me. She sure as fuck doesn’t need you.
The jealous, possessive thought shocked me. It came to me so fast, I hadn’t even really thought about it, like it was some truth buried deep inside me.
“She doesn’t see people for who they really are, and you’re exactly the sort of asshole who would happily take advantage of that.”
Hadn’t I thought that same exact thing before? That Hera wasn’t careful enough, that she didn’t realize how dangerous people were? I didn’t much care about it being twisted around to apply to me, though.
“Funny for you to say that, given you’re at least as dangerous to her as I am.”