It sounded a lot like Deacon, to go behind my back and do what he thought was right for me without even trying to get credit.
“I think I’m going back to bed.”
“Not a chance. You’ve slept enough. You need to shower, then we’re going out.”
“I don’t feel like it.”
“Too bad. You’ve gotten time to rest, and now you’re just hiding. Licking your wounds is one thing, but you won’t feel better until you start moving again.”
I wanted to tell him to fuck off, but one look at him kept me from doing so, especially because he wasn’t wrong.
“Go on, shower time. Nothing like hot water to make a person feel like themselves.”
I pushed away from the island as Wade took my plate. The sound of him washing the last dish followed me as I went into the master bath.
The marks didn’t bother me anymore, neither the one at my throat nor the others I’d accumulated overmy time at Larkwood. They’d done fewer biopsies, so the wounds from the last Medical trip didn’t bother me as much, at least not physically, and it made a shower possible.
I stripped down and turned on the water, twisting the handle to hot. I didn’t want a long shower, but the idea of burning away anything on me sounded great. I wanted to scrub each place the doctor and nurses had touched me, as if that would somehow reclaim my body for myself.
I just wanted to be my own, to belong to myself, but after my time with Medical, after being trapped here and having to do as I was told, I wasn’t sure I could have that again.
Chapter Seven
Wade
I snooped around Hera’s room after I’d finished cleaning up, while she showered. I’d even straightened her room and got laundry started for her, including her sheets. Nothing better than clean sheets when a person didn’t feel well. The second set was already on, the bed made for whenever she crawled back into it.
I didn’t feel guilty about snooping, either. Privacy was some distant concept here at Larkwood, and given I’d spent nearly all my life here, it wasn’t one I abided by. It was a stupid social norm people prized far too much. The only privacy a person got was what was in their head.
And even that wasn’t entirely secure given telepathic shades.
Still, I’d found nothing too interesting in her room. Hera was fairly upfront as a person, so I hadn’texpected to find some huge secret. She just wasn’t that type, and her face was too easy to read.
Which left me to leaf through the books she had, most of which I’d suggested to her.
I glanced toward the clock and frowned. It had been an hour, and shestillwasn’t out. Unease prickled at me, and while I wanted to give her the time to get herself together—and the idea of interrupting her in the shower felt like a lot for me—it had been too long.
I went to the door of the master bathroom, hearing the water still running. I knocked and called her name, but nothing came back.
The idea of seeing her naked made me hesitate. We hadn’t gone anywhere close to that far yet, and the thought of it rooted me in place. Sure, Iwantedthat, more than I should, enough that it made me uneasy and distrusting of myself. Self-control wasn’t exactly a great trait of mine, and when it came to sex, it hadn’t been something I’d had to do before as I hadn’t had any options. I had no interest in guards, and what shade would allow me to touch them when it made them vulnerable?
But no matter how worried it made me, I couldn’t just turn around and avoid her, couldn’t leave until I knew she was okay.
I took a deep breath then turned the handle, glad to find it unlocked. I pushed the door open to a room filled with steam.
Hera’s naked back greeted me inside the shower. I swallowed hard at the sight, stunned enough to see it all before I lifted my gaze to try to keep it from anything she’d rather keep private.
Though, it wasn’t like the memory of her ass didn’t play through my head. I held in a groan as I tried to get myself under control.
Don’t be a creep. She’s clearly struggling, you asshole—don’t look at her like this.
I went closer, then called her name again.
This time it got through, because she spun toward me, her eyes wide and her skin a pink that bordered on red from the heat of the water. She blinked slowly, the pain in her hazel eyes so obvious that a blind man could see it.
All the lust drifted away at that, at the way she trembled. Her hands moved, so quick that I struggled at first to keep up and understand.“I can’t stop the sounds. I can’t use the tricks to shut it out and everything is so loud. I don’t know if it’s the toxin or the drugs or what happened with Medical, but it’s just all so loud.”
I suspected tears ran down her cheeks, but with the water, I couldn’t tell.