“Not until every wound is healed that can be.”
Dark had fallen before she walked with Bollocks through the woods toward the cottage. She’d had word, though not much of one, that Keegan had taken two survivors from the enemy camp to the Capital.
What would happen from there, she couldn’t say. For now, she wanted a shower, as long and as hot as she could stand it.
“Go on, go take a swim.” She bent down to hug Bollocks. “You’re as filthy as I am. You were so good today, helping comfort the baby dragons. You have such a good heart. Take a swim.”
She turned toward the cottage, and Marco opened the door.
“Breen.”
Filthy or not, she rushed to him, gathered him close.
“I’m sorry. I’m so sorry. Is he here?”
“Upstairs.” Marco’s tears spilled onto her neck. “He won’t eat. And I don’t know if I found the right words. His heart’s broken, Breen. I knew you were okay, because Morena flew back once to let us know what was happening. But Brian—”
“It’s like losing a part of yourself, of your heart. I don’t know how to explain. I felt such terrible fear when I saw the attack, before I felt Lonrach coming.”
“Could you— Jesus, I can see you’re so worn out, but could you…”
“You want me to talk to him. Another rider,” she said with a nod. “Yes, of course I will. Bollocks is going to be hungry.”
“I’ll take care of him. He’s hurting so deep, Breen.”
“I know.”
She went upstairs, not sure what she could or would say. But she tapped on the door, and opened it to see Brian sitting in the dark by the open window.
“It’s Breen.” She stepped in, closed the door. “I won’t stay if you want me to go. I’m just so sorry.” Taking a chance, she crossed to him to lay a hand on his shoulder.
He reached up, closed his around hers.
“I felt him fall, and part of me died. I felt him fly up, take arrows, flaming, using himself as a shield for the young. And falling, his great heart stopping.”
Saying nothing, she laid her cheek on top of his head.
“So my heart stopped, for a moment. Just stopped like death. And I didn’t want it to start again. But… it did, and I think it might not have beat again, but Marco’s in it.”
She came around the chair to kneel in front of him. “There are no words deep enough, Brian. I know that because my heart and Lonrach’s are bound. You can be proud Hero died to save others, but that pride can’t cut through the grief. Marco’s heart and yours are bound, too, and still, a piece of yours broke today.”
“Aye.” He took her hand again. “He wants to comfort me, but that piece won’t ever meld full. It’s not meant to.”
“No, it’s not. But the rest of your heart, and all of his, will be strong again.”
“How many are gone?”
“I don’t know, but I know we healed many, saved many. One, so young, so badly hurt, I was afraid I couldn’t help. But as he healed, I saw him. I’ve seen him before, in my head, and saw him as he healed. He’ll be Finian’s. Mahon’s boy. And they’ll ride, Brian.”
“Truly?”
“Truly.”
He nodded. “And the ones who did this evil thing?”
“Dead, all but two. Keegan took them to the Capital.”
“They’ll face Judgment. One day, I might feel that’s enough. One day. But this day, nothing could be. Lonrach? I didn’t ask.”