“You’re right,” he said. “She is here.” But I wasn’t sure who he was talking to. He kept his eyes locked on me. Then he swayed, and Ryker reached out and grabbed him.
“You’re drunk,” Ryker told him. “You saw her, just like I promised. Now I’m taking you home to sleep this shit off.”
He shoved Ryker then. “I’m fine. She can go. I’m not going anywhere,” he slurred. “These are my friends. My fucking friends.”
I stood up. Although it was clear he was drunk, his words were still like a slap in my face. You were honest when you were drunk. That’s what I’d always heard. Maggie reached up and grabbed my arm. “Don’t go. He’s just had too much to drink.”
“Don’t matter how much I’ve had to drink. She can go,” Nash shouted.
Ryker shoved him down into an empty chair and glared at him. “Shut the fuck up,” he ordered.
I pulled my arm from Maggie’s hold and walked around the group. “It’s best that I leave. Thank you for inviting me, Riley. It was great to see everyone,” I said with a smile I knew wasn’t fooling anyone, but it was the best I could do.
“I’m sorry about this,” Riley said.
I nodded. I knew she hadn’t expected them to show up here.
“Let’s go to lunch tomorrow,” Willa called out to me as I reached the door.
“Okay,” I replied, hoping I could make it out of here with my smile in place.
Several others called out how good it was to see me, and I managed to nod and reply. As I opened the door, Rykermuttered a curse, and I heard a noise behind me. I turned around to see the chair Nash had been sitting in fallen over on the floor and Nash coming directly at me.
Ryker grabbed for him, and Nash swung him off as his gaze stayed glued to me. I couldn’t move. He didn’t stop until he was so close to me his chest was touching mine, and I took a shaky breath. He reeked of whiskey.
Then he lowered his head and his lips brushed my ear. I trembled. My body reacted to him as if it belonged to him.
“You smell like vanilla. So fucking sweet,” he whispered as his hand gripped my waist. “Just like I remember.”
I didn’t move, but a whimper escaped me.
He ran the tip of his nose across my cheek and back to my ear. “I want to take you to bed with me.”
“Okay, that’s enough. You’re scaring her,” Ryker said, and suddenly Nash was taken away from me. His eyes went to mine, and for a moment he looked panicked. He hadn’t been scaring me, but he had been breaking me all over again.
“You good?” Brady asked me, and I managed a nod.
“I’ll walk you to your car,” West offered, walking around Ryker and Nash.
Nash moved then and grabbed West. “Don’t fucking go near her!”
Startled by his angry outburst, I moved back quickly and grabbed the doorknob again. “That’s okay,” I said. “I…I… need to go. Thanks again.” I didn’t wait for anyone to respond as I hurried out of the door and to my car. Thankful I had parked on the side of the road and not pulled into the driveway so that I could leave without needing someone inside to move their car. This night had been too much. My emotions felt raw and exposed. The pain in my chest was as intense as it had been the day Nash walked away from me.
Coming back was a mistake, but where did I belong? “Tallulah!” Nash’s voice called out my name just as I reached my car. I froze, unsure if I should jump in my car and escape this or wait. Hearing much more from Nash was going to break me. Being here again was hard enough.
“I’m sorry. I’m drunk,” his voice was closer now. Too close.
I turned slowly and looked at him. I had loved him for most of my life. He’d been my crush from the time I was a kid. Then he had become my first at so many things. Nash Lee had been my world until the day he wasn’t. “Let’s not do this,” I begged softly. My heart couldn’t take it.
“I can’t let you walk away. I just… I just want to look at you. I spend my days wanting to look at you, to hear you talk, to see you smile.” He groaned and ran a hand through his hair. “Even after you destroyed me, all I wanted was you. Why can’t I get over you? Why can’t I forget? Why, Tallulah?” his voice cracked and he swayed as he stared atme. His eyes so full of regret and pain. Emotions I understood too well.
“This isn’t the time to talk about this,” I told him gently. He wouldn’t remember much in the morning. Although I wanted his words to be real. Not drunken ramblings.
“When you leave again it’s going to rip me to fucking shreds. Because even though I don’t have you, I know you’re near. Just having you in the same town has helped me wake up every morning… God, I miss you.”
“Nash!” West called out from the porch and then made his way down the stairs and toward us. He would take Nash inside and I would drive away. My heart couldn’t take much more of the things Nash was saying and I knew it was for the best that West stopped this but a big part of me wanted to throw myself into Nash’s arms and cry.
“That’s enough,” West said, coming up behind him. “You want to talk to her, then do it sober. Not like this. This isn’t fucking fair and you’ll regret it.”