“When are you going to talk to her? You sent her the invitation. She came. Now follow through,” Ryker said.
I had fought with myself all damn day about going overto her mom’s house. I just hadn’t been able to do it for fear that seeing her would be more than I could take. I felt like I was on a ledge and I was holding on the best I could. Tallulah was the only one I feared could push me off the damn ledge. She was the reason I struggled to hold on in the first place.
“I talked to Brady. Riley went to see her,” Ryker said.
“They were close once,” I reminded him.
“Which is why you need to go see Tallulah. She talked to Riley, and Brady said you needed to talk to her too.”
I gripped the railing in front of me and glared out straight ahead. They didn’t understand. They had no fucking idea how hard that would be. Neither of them had faced the pain I’d been through this past year. “I can’t,” I bit out through my clenched teeth.
“Then why did you invite her? And don’t give me thatwe all belong hereshit. That’s not why you did it.”
“Too many shots of Patrón,” I replied.
“You can blame it on the damn tequila all you want, but we both know you sent it because you wanted to see her. You miss her. You aren’t the same person without her. If there is a chance that you could fix this, that you could have her back, then don’t waste it. You walked away last time and didn’t give her a chance to explain. It’s been a year. It’s time now. It’s fucking past time.”
I shoved away from the railing and ran my hands through my hair as a growl of frustration rose in my chest. “ALL I CAN SEE IS HER FUCKING LIPS ON HIS!” I yelled and kicked the wall, then slammed both my palms flat against it as the image replayed in my head. Taunting me like it always did. “I can’t see anything else,” I choked out then and laid my forehead on the cool bricks. “Daily it rips me apart, but then I miss her so damn much, I think I can forget it. If she’d just come back to me,” I admitted.
Ryker let out a heavy sigh. “I can’t make you talk to her. No one can. That’s gotta be you, brother. She came for you. Not this field or anyone else. She came for you. Now the ball is in your field.”
I didn’t say anything. I stayed there with my forehead against the damn wall and my eyes closed. Ryker walked away, leaving me to my own demons. He had said what he’d come to say, and I knew he was right. I just didn’t know if I was strong enough to look at her.
Needing a distraction, I went to my truck and headed to the only bar in town, Lions Turf. It was owned by a former Lawton Lion running back who had played with my dad and uncle. I’d stay away from the tequila tonight and stick with whiskey. While stopped at a red light, I sent out a text to the guys, even Ryker, who I knew would be pissed thiswas where I’d ended up instead of Tallulah’s. By the time I pulled into the parking lot, West and Gunner were already stepping out of Gunner’s expensive wheels.
“I’m guessing you talked to Brady,” Gunner called out when I got out of my truck.
“Not here to talk about her. Just want to drink and play some pool,” I warned him. Gunner had no filter, nor did he fucking want one. He said whatever he was thinking.
We were almost at the door when Brady pulled up in the parking lot. He was still several feet away when Gunner yelled, “He don’t want to talk about Tallulah, so don’t bring that shit up.”
I turned and shoved open the door, wishing I’d just come here by myself.
“Jesus, Gunner,” West muttered.
“What? I was shutting it down,” Gunner replied.
I headed for the bar. It was past time I had a drink.
“Ryker coming?” Gunner asked then.
I shrugged. “Not sure.”
“What about Asa?” Gunner asked.
I didn’t reply.
“He’s probably banging it out with Ezmita. He waited five years for her. We might not see him for a while,” West replied.
I wasn’t in the mood to discuss anyone’s sex life, and I hoped those two would shut the hell up or at least let me get enough drinks in me first.
“I stand corrected!” West announced.
Glancing back over my shoulder, I saw Asa and Ryker walking in behind Brady. They all came. Every fucking one.
CHAPTER FOUR
TALLULAH