As it turned out, she could take care of herself, though. Jillian put a hand on his chest and got right up in Eric’s face. “Yes, it is a coincidence, but more importantly, it’s none of your goddamned business. I told you I never wanted to see or talk to you ever again. I meant it. Run along. Leave us alone.”
Eric’s face turned red. But before he could respond, Jillian tugged on my hand and stalked away, practically dragging me. I could hear Eric yelling behind us, spouting something or other about our parents, but I carried on. A public fight wasn’t my style, and I wasn’t tacky enough to punch my own brother, as much as I wanted to.
Back in our seats, Jillian dropped her defenses and started shaking violently. It could have been worse, but it had still been ugly. I felt horrible for putting her through that.
“I’m sorry, baby. I had no idea he would be here.” I told her.
It had been an accident, but I had messed up. Big time. I should have checked, somehow. We had been hoping to put it off several more weeks, and we absolutely hadn’t intended on making our relationship into a public spectacle.
“I know. It’s not your fault. I just hate how he….” She trailed off, hugging her arms to her chest and looking blankly at the field.
I tried to hold her, but she shifted away. I sighed and sat back. Once again Eric had messed her up, and I couldn’t make it better.
We watched the rest of the game in a haze of silence, seeing exactly none of it. Jillian was fully zoned out, and I was on constant alert for my brother. We should have just left after running into him, but it hadn’t occurred to either of us at the time.
I drove us home later, clutching the steering wheel in a death grip. Worried about what Jillian might do. Or how long she might shut me out. Miraculously, she let me inside her place, but she promptly fell onto the couch and curled into a ball, looking more miserable than I’d ever seen her, including after her world class hangover.
Unsure what to do, I sat on the other end and massaged her foot. “We knew it would happen eventually. A public game wasn’t ideal, maybe, but at least it’s over now.”
Jillian buried her face in her hands and let out a sound somewhere between a scream and a groan. “It’s not over. Trust me. He won’t just let it go. Cheating or not, it’s an affront to his pride that I’ve already moved on. That it’s you I moved on to will send him over the edge. And I guarantee he’s told your parents by now.”
She lifted her head an inch or two, peering up at me over her fingers, her eyes filled with worry. “They’ll think I’m a cheating slut, just like he does. They’ll never accept us dating, let alone the drunken marriage part. They’ll never respect me, ever again. This is exactly what I was worried about. If we had been able to control the story, maybe we could have made it less sketchy, but it’s only been a few weeks. He’s right, it looks bad. Maybe it is bad. Is something wrong with me? Is fantastic sex all it takes to win me over?”
“Uhh, I’m really not sure how to answer that,” I started to say, stuck on the last part. Then I saw her ashen face. “I mean, no, of course not. Nothing is wrong with you. You were in a terrible relationship and unhappy. And we’ve had these feelings for a long time. That’s not something either of us could control. Don’t let him get into your head. We both know the real story.”
“Still. He’s going to do everything he can to ruin us,” she mumbled.
I wanted to say something to comfort her, but she was mostly right. Eric had a temper and could be a total shit. I had no doubt he’d try to make things difficult. My parents, though, were a different story. They were generally reasonable people.
“Hey, it will be fine, I promise,” I assured her as I continued rubbing her foot. “I’ll explain what really happened, or most of it, at least. Eric might be pissed for a while, but who cares? My parents will believe me that nothing happened before you guys broke up. And they’ll see how happy you make me. And how happy I make you. That’s what matters, right?”
She blew out a long, harsh breath. “I doubt it will be that easy.”
“We’ll get past it,” I insisted.
Eventually Jillian did relax, and I carried her off to bed, where she snuggled up against me. It definitely wasn’t one of our top five sexiest nights, but we found much needed comfort with each other.
I would never tell her the truth, but I was more worried about the reaction from my family than I had lead on. I’d committed the number one sin between brothers. I didn’t think that it was entirely my fault, but it didn’t matter. Growing up in our household a fight was fight, and it didn’t matter who had started it, we just needed to fix it. But I wasn’t sure I could find a good way out of this, not without telling my parents about the marriage.
Even though I kept telling Jillian that the worst was over, I had the distinct suspicion that it wasn’t. Far from it.
CHAPTER11
Jillian
Iwoke up alone in my bed.
It was one of only a handful of days in the last year that I hadn’t woken up next to a McIntyre boy, I realized. Ugh, I was really, really starting to suspect that I was a terrible person, going from one brother to another like that, without a second thought. I probably deserved whatever awful things Eric and his family would inevitably say about me.
Then again, Ihadn’tcheated. I would never be as bad as Eric. And that thought, at least, cheered me up.
After an hour of lazing around and avoiding reality, I pulled myself out of bed and showered. I had no real plans for the day, which was a nice change of pace. Dean and I had decided, mostly mutually, to take a day to ourselves. We both needed some space. We had started things off so hot and heavy and had jumped right into the most serious relationship imaginable. The encounter the other night had reminded us how quickly things had changed between us all.
Besides, if I knew Dean, he would be spending the day trying to smooth things over with his parents. Possibly Eric, but that was less likely after his reaction the other night. Whatever Dean was doing, it was good for us to do our own thing for a day.
I stood by my decision, but as I dressed and considered my options, I couldn’t deny that I already missed Dean. I considered texting Paige or Fiona to come over and keep my mind off him, but I’d been sort of avoiding them both lately. I didn’t want to lie to them about Dean, but I wasn’t ready to tell them everything, either. Not until it was settled, one way or another.
And after that gross encounter with Eric, things between me and dean were far from settled.