As I climb the stairs, I remember the person she was in that closet with strangers. A different version of Ellie that I’ve never seen before and never expected to feel up close and personal.
Just the thought of her soft moans has my cock hardening in my pants, and the memory of Dornan’s booming voice disrupting our moment makes me seethe with anger. Fuck.
It’s so wrong to view Ellie sexually. I’m her stepbrother, and that should put any kind of relationship off limits. Forget how furious my dad would be, and her mom. Lara would never look at my brothers and me the same again.
But I can’t stop reflecting on the soft fragrance of her skin or the way she clutched at me as she came. It’s like she opened a box of secrets and let me rummage around, and now I’ve seen what’s in the box; closing the lid is impossible.
How can we sit opposite each other at breakfast and not remember what happened at Dornan’s party? How can we chat with our parents as though nothing happened?
At the top of the stairs, I tip my head from side to side, stretching out my neck as though I’m limbering up for a game. My hands instinctively flex into fists before loosening again. I bounce up onto my toes and then inhale a deep breath. It’s not that I fear facing Ellie. Not in the slightest. But for the first time ever, I’m worried about how our interaction will go. Things between us have always been frosty. In the beginning, I tried so hard. I wanted her to feel comfortable in our home. I wanted her to like us, but she always held back, so I stopped trying. Will it be worse now we’ve overstepped the sibling line?
Will she hate us? Will she blame us? Does she regret what happened?
Or worse. Will she feel violated?
The thought that she might look back on last night with regret or worse causes my heart to do a fucked-up thud that feels black with dread.
Standing with my hand poised to knock on Ellie’s door, I close my eyes for a second, making a vow to whoever might be listening that if this goes okay, I’ll be a better man. I’ll try harder. Work more. Volunteer more. Be kinder.
The thump of my fist on the wood is abrupt and loud, and I crane my ear to the door, so I can hear better. There’s no noise inside, then a muffled ‘go away’ emanates from deep in the room.
“Ellie, you need to open this door,” I say with as much conviction as possible. I’ve learned that a stern and confident voice can compel people to act.
“Leave me alone,” she says, but it’s after a pause.
“Your mom is worried about you. If you don’t open the door, she will come up.”
More silence, but then I hear a shuffling sound, as though Ellie’s dragging more than just her sweet ass across the wood floor.
When the lock rattles in the door, I take a step back.
It’s opened just a crack, and a disheveled Ellie peers around the white-painted wood so that all I can see is a half-closed eye, messy curls, and a pair of pretty but scowling lips.
“I’m not coming down,” she says. “You and your brothers know why. How about you keep my mom at bay…you always know how to twist her around your finger.”
She tries to push the door closed, but I shove my foot into the gap. “We didn’t know it was you,” I admit.
“And you think I did?” she hisses.
“So it’s nobody’s fault, is it? We’re all adults. We just need to get on with it. Pretend it never happened.”
Her dark eyes stare into mine as though she’s trying to dig past my words, deep into my thoughts and the truth of how I’m feeling. “And that’s easy for you, is it?” she asks.
There’s no right way to respond to her question that’s been tossed into the crackling air between us like barbed wire, designed to snag and tear. Saying yes means it meant nothing to me. She meant nothing. Saying no means that I’m hung up on her in a way that’s past the boundaries of acceptability.
“I’m trying,” I say, treading a middle line. “That’s all any of us can do.”
She blinks, shocked. “Just tell mom I’m exhausted. Offer to bring me food. That should be enough to get her off our backs.”
I nod once, folding in my bottom lip to moisten it. If I closed my eyes, I could conjure the taste of her skin. If I was alone in my room, I could make myself come so hard recalling the press of her rounded ass against my cock. But I can’t do any of that. I just need to forget and find a way to ensure Lara doesn’t come up here to bother her daughter.