The first thrust of his huge cock burns despite how lubricated I am, but I’ve grown used to the feeling now. There’s an element of violation that comes with fucking men who are this hung. An aspect that I know I won’t ever be able to do without.
Colby rolls over me so that my body is almost face down, and his big, muscular frame spreads out on top of me. It’s hard to breathe this way, but it’s fine. The more of his power I feel, the less I remember all the reasons we shouldn’t be acting this way.
“You feel so good,” he says, nipping the soft flesh between my neck and shoulder with his teeth and then using his tongue to soothe.
“You’re so big,” I say, gaining a growl in response.
With one hand, Colby grips my hair, tugging my face from the pillow. My scalp burns, and so do my cheeks, as he shoves his thumb into my mouth. I don’t suck it as I did with Micky because that isn’t what Colby wants. When I bite down, he shoves it deeper, pressing down the back of my tongue, and I know he remembers what it feels like when I swallow against the head of his cock. Maybe he’s even remembering how it looks to watch his brothers pushing their cocks between my lips.
Once last week, they all stood in front of me, and I kneeled, moving between them, letting them use my mouth until I was a mess of their cum, and they were staring down at me, wide-eyed, as though they were struggling to reconcile the woman at their feet with the stepsister they’d practically grown up with.
Tonight, I come just from the stretch of Colby’s cock and the thoughts that swell and travel like flames through my mind, biting down on his thumb and twitching against him, my body more out of control than it’s ever been. And he follows, tightening his grip on my hair, seizing like lightning has struck him dead.
It’s less about pleasure and more about exorcising our demons. I know Colby is as twisted up inside about this as me. I know the guilt about our lying to our parents is eating at him more than the others. It’s because he doesn’t want to be a disappointment. I see that part of him clearly because I’m exactly the same. Twisted up by expectations. Racked with self-reproach.
When we’ve both returned to our senses, Colby once again tries to roll me to my back, but I resist.
He pauses for a few moments as though there are questions on the tip of his tongue, but unlike his usually demanding self, he resists asking.
Does he suspect he won’t like the answers? Probably.
Instead, he does what Micky did, kissing my neck, telling me I’m beautiful, reminding me that what we have is worth the risk, and trying to convince himself.
And I don’t disagree.
But I don’t agree either.
I love you, I think, but the words die in the warm cavern of my mouth, snuffed out by guilt and dread of what it will feel like to lose him.
Seb is the last to find his way to my room. I wonder if they drew straws or flipped a coin to decide the order. Have they worked out a schedule with times so that they don’t cross paths, or is it their intention to come to me all at once sometimes? What would that look like, three huge men tiptoeing across the hall, sneaking into their stepsister’s room?
It would look guilty. That’s what it would look like.
Seb doesn’t slide between my sheets in the way the others did. He walks around to the side of the bed I’m pretending to sleep on and kneels in front of me. His fingers graze my cheek, playing with my curls. His mouth whispers my name.
“Ellie, I know you’re awake,” he says.
I open my eyes slowly, finding him smiling at me in the dark.
“You know how I know?” he asks. “Because you breathe differently when you’re really asleep.”
I smile fleetingly. “Have you been perving over me while I’ve been unconscious?”
“Definitely,” he says. “You have no idea how sexy you look with your naked body splayed across my sheets and your mouth wide open.” Chuckling, he grabs my hand when I try to swat his shoulder. The weight of feelings that have had me close to tears all night lift with his smile.
“I do not sleep with my mouth open,” I whisper.
“Errr…you do,” he grins, “but don’t worry. I’ve got something meaty to put in that mouth.”
“Gross.” I screw up my nose, the image of his cock replaced with a thick red salami, and Seb laughs silently.
“That’s not what you were saying the other day.” He’s got me there. “So, have my brothers worn out you, or do you still have some sexy-time energy left for me?”