“Says the guy who’s hooking up with a girl and his two brothers. It doesn’t exactly make you conservative, man!”
I snort, realizing how odd this conversation is all around. “You have a point, Dornan.”
He finishes his burger in two more bites and stuffs the rest of his fries into his mouth, washing it all down with some water. I try to eat too, but I have an odd feeling in my stomach that I’m not used to.
Anxiousness.
There’s a lot on the line.
Even if Dad can fix his marriage, our hopes for a relationship with Ellie feel almost impossible.
As Dornan stands, nodding and saying, see you around, I weigh up what he said.
She’ll be okay to keep things between the four of you.
Will she?
And would it even be fair to ask?
22
MICKY
In total, we spend two more nights at Molly’s. With encouragement from us, Dad convinces Lara that he is genuinely regretful. She agrees to go on a two-week vacation to Jamaica to give them the time and space to sort things out.
Dad asks us to wait until they’ve left for the airport before we move back into our home, which we’re happy to agree to. Even though we have done nothing wrong, we all feel awkward as hell about coming face-to-face with Lara. It sounds stupid, but I know I’d want to apologize to her on my dad’s behalf.
We arrive in the late afternoon with our few possessions clutched in our hands. As Sebastian opens the front door and we step inside, I get the same feeling as when we’ve been away for a two-week vacation. Everything looks the same, but there is an awkward sense of unfamiliarity.
Ellie’s car is in the driveway, confirming she’s home, and even though we’ve had long discussions about what happens next, we are unsure how things will play out.
Music emanates from the kitchen, so we leave our bags in the hallway, glancing at each other, seeking confirmation of our next step, before we make our way through.
When Ellie spots us, she stops grating cheese onto her pasta and stares without smiling. The unfamiliarity extends to our stepsister, too.
“Hey,” I say, wanting to break the ice as quickly as possible, needing to see the same warmth and affection in her eyes as before.
“If you’re looking for your dad, he left already,” she says, dropping her gaze so that she can focus on the cheese grating again. It feels like she’s using it as a distraction so that she doesn’t have to look at us. My stomach twists into an uncomfortable knot.
“We know,” I say. “He called to tell us the plans.”
“A luxury vacation to bribe my mom,” she says, still staring at her meal.
Colby, who’s chosen to stand leaning against the wall near the door, clears his throat. “That isn’t what it is, Ellie. It’s a chance for them to spend time together.”
“They could have spent time together here.” Ellie waves the grater in a circle, spraying tiny fragments of cheese over the counter and onto the floor.
“With the four of us standing around watching?” Seb steps closer and smiles cautiously, expecting Ellie to be amused by the picture he just painted.
“Throwing money at an emotional problem is just masking the issues.”
“Isn’t it up to them to decide what to do about problems in their own marriage,” Colby says.
“It’s a good thing,” I interrupt, already feeling the old tension between Ellie and my brother bubbling. None of us wants it to boil over, especially now. “They should take some time away. They haven’t been on vacation for over a year.”
“Men are all the same,” Ellie says dryly. “They always let you down when you need them.”
“That’s a little harsh.” I try to keep my tone soft to diffuse some of Ellie’s tension, but it doesn’t seem to work. “Dad made a mistake, and he’s trying to make things right, but that doesn’t mean you can tar half the world’s population with the same brush.”
“Can’t I?” Turning to toss the grater into the sink, we get a full view of our stepsister’s rigid posture. I don’t know what I expected from our reunion, but it isn’t this. At worst, I imagined her regretting what we did at Molly’s motel. At best, I was hoping she’d sink into our arms and seek reassurance, which we’d be more than happy to give.
Taking her bowl of pasta, she starts towards the door, finished with the conversation.
Colby won’t let her have the last word, though.
When he blocks her exit, there’s a stare-off of epic proportions. I marvel at how she handles herself with such confidence, even though she’s half the size of him. “We’re not to blame for our father’s mistake,” Colby says slowly. “And just because he betrayed your mom doesn’t mean that we will do the same to you.”
“To me?” she cocks her head to one side. “You won’t do anything to me because the dares are over now. We’re finished.”