The only problem is, there are only two of us here right now.Which means I would have to be the attacker that's on top of Hailey.
I shuffle nervously, once again regretting this idea. I try to offer us a way out of the situation. "Do you want to do more striking? I could get you a pair of gloves, we could do some kickboxing on the heavy bags..."
She's shaking her head before I've even finished. "No, I've already done that. I want to do some jiu-jitsu. That's the piece I'm missing. And I know that's the best self-defense, so I want to do that."
I inhale a shaky breath but give her a tight nod. I lead her over to the small mat at the back of the room, away from all the heavy bags. I sit down and pat the mat next to me, gesturing for her to sit down.
"Okay, we'll go over how to stand up first. Believe it or not, people don't stand up right. There's a way to brace yourself and make sure you're always balanced and ready when you're standing up."
I go over the technique with her, and although it's not the cleanest move I've ever seen, she seems to understand the gist of it. She's graceful but looks like I could knock her over with a heavy exhale if I really tried.
I move onto the next move before she can get too frustrated with this one.
Fuck, this is the one that's going to kill me.
I gesture for her to sit down, and then I drop to my knees in front of her. I clear my suddenly-dry throat. "Uh, do you know what full guard position is? When I'm on top and you're on bottom?"
I hear her breath catch, but she nods quickly. I know her sister loves MMA enough to both explain the basics of the sport, and to instill a respect for it. Even though certain jiu-jitsu positions could be seen as sexual simply because of their closeness, anyone that understands the sport even a little bit knows not to treat it that way. It's a martialart, and an important one, at that. Nothing about it should be treated with anything less than 100% focus and respect.
But despite being a professional with years of practice, none of that computes right now. The only thing I'm focused on is the fact that I'm about to get on top of Hailey.
And she knows it.
I hold my hands up in a gesture of surrender, so as to make the objective clear and to ensure I don't spook her. Although at this point, that might be more for my benefit than hers. "I'm going to be on top in your full guard, simulating someone choking you from on top. Is that okay?"
Her breathing is still erratic, and I swear I see a slight color in her cheeks, but she nods and lies down. Slowly, so fucking slowly, I shuffle forward on my knees until I can nudge her knees apart. I slide between her legs, moving forward far enough that I can reach her throat with my hands, but not close enough that my increasingly growing, and completely inappropriate, erection actually presses against her.
I don't even lie to myself about the fact that I would 100% combust in front of her if that happened. Typically, you want to be as close to your opponent as possible in jiu-jitsu, but right now, distance is the only thing keeping me sane.
I gently wrap my hands around her throat, and this time I couldn't miss her tight inhale even if I wanted to. There's definitely color in her cheeks now, and she's looking up at me with a gaze that there's no mistaking the meaning of.
She's turned on.
I tell myself it's a natural reaction to the close proximity, that anyone who hasn't done this sport before has this same reaction. It's undoubtedly weird the first time you try it because everything looks sexual. You're rolling around on the ground with another person, your legs wrapped around each other... of course people are going to have inappropriate thoughts. It's only natural.
That doesn't stop my dick from hardening even more from the look in her eye. That knowledge doesn't help one bit.
And when I suddenly remember Hailey's comment the other night about the particularflavorof sex that she enjoys, I have to swallow the groan that wants so badly to roll across my tongue.
This was officially the worst idea I've ever had.
But I can't exactly stand up and walk out right now, so I take a deep breath and start talking.
"Okay, you're going to twist onto one hip, so you're on your side, and then slide your shin across my chest and stomach as a sort of block, so I can't push forward. That's it." I'm not sure how much of this heat Hailey feels—although based on the pink that's flushed across her porcelain skin, my guess is a decent amount—but it's not stopping her from doing the move. That knowledge helps me swallow back a little more of that urge to grab her and pull her under me forreal.
"Good, now I want you to get up on your elbow with one hand and brace on my shoulder with the other to keep me away from you. Now, simulate slapping or kicking me in order to get me off of you. Like that. Good girl." She does as I say, lashing out at me and forcing me to fall back so I don't get caught with one of her strikes. "Now that you've created distance between us, stand up with the move we did right before this. Keep your balance and don't ever take your eyes off of me."
She stands, but it's just as shaky as the first few times she did it. Being unsure of the movements doesn't help either; she's one shove away from falling over, and based on the frustrated look on her face, she knows it.
Before I can even encourage her to try again, she lies down and gestures for me to do it again. I'm not entirely sure why she's so frustrated, but it does seem to distract us from the tension of our close proximity. We barely hitch a breath when I wrap my hands around her neck this time.
She goes through the steps again, blocking my body with her shin and then striking out at me with a slap. But the block is a flimsy one and we both know I could easily overpower it. By the time she manages to get to her feet, she's visibly even more frustrated than she was with her first rep.
"Again," she snaps. Without a word, we go through it again. It's slightly better this time, but not by much. And I can tell it's really starting to get to her.
"Hailey, it's okay,” I try to appease her. I step closer to where she’s standing with her hands on her hips, willing my gentle words to break through her mental block. “Not everyone is going to get it on the first try. It takes dozens of repetitions to get the hang of it so don't worry if—"
"Let's just do it again," she interrupts as she drops back to the mat, her frustration visibly morphing into anger. I'm starting to wonder if there's something else going on that has nothing to do with our self-defense lesson.