Only now, it's more than just sex.
I asked her to stay with me last night. I've never wanted to ask a girl to stay. I've never cared to spend more time with them after I've come down from my orgasm high. If they did stay it was only because I'm not enough of a dick to send them home when it’s late. But I've never wanted to spend more time with them, or keep the physical touch going without having sex. I've never wanted to cuddle.
But last night—as well as this very moment—I can't seem to get enough of Remy's body against mine. It feels like there's a current running between us that's constantly pulling us together, an energy that's also hypnotizing me and demanding that I spend as much time around her as I can. Kissing her, touching her, talking to her.
It should probably scare me, but it feels so natural to want to be around her that I can’t really bring myself to be freaked out about it. She’s been in my life for longer than probably any other girl so there’s already a level of comfort between us that I’ve never experienced before. And no matter how I look at it, I can’t see wanting to spend time with Remy—in bed, out of bed, in the gym, everywhere in between—as anything but a good thing.
The sex isn't even on the forefront of my mind anymore—I just wanther.
The thought makes my breath catch and my eyes shoot open.
I want Remy? Since when do I have any interest in a girlfriend?
My focus has been on fighting for years now. The whole reason I've stayed away from steady girlfriends—other than not finding anyone interesting enough to hold my attention—is because I need to be selfish to be a good fighter. 'Selfish' and 'boyfriend' don't exactly go together in a sentence.
Yet when I look at Remy, I can't fathom any of that. I just want more time with her. Surely, I have time outside of the gym to spend with another person? Is that enough to be a good boyfriend?
Does she even want a boyfriend?
I suddenly realize the insane turn my thoughts have taken. I frown and mentally shake the images from my head—of fight nights with Remy curled in my lap, of dinner in the city, of lazy Sundays between the sheets. I'm getting way ahead of myself here.
I gently slide away from Remy, trying not to wake her. I smile when I see her frown in her sleep at the missing weight of my arm around her.
Pulling the sheet up her body—and growling when her delicious tits are no longer visible to me—I exhale one final smile at the sight of her before quietly grabbing what I need for the gym. I slip out of my room a few minutes later.
I'm not sure how I get through my classes and private lessons at the gym today; I'm completely distracted with thoughts of Remy. I occasionally glance at my phone, debating texting her, but I give up on the idea when I realize I'm not sure what I'd actually say. I turn back to my students with a sigh.
It's almost 8:00 when I'm finally done working and teaching for the day. I once again think about calling Remy, this time with the idea of just flat out asking her if she wants to hang out. But the fact that I'm not sure what her answer would be has me discarding that idea, too. I still have no clue where her head is at with us.
I cringe.Us. When did I become that guy?
Apparently when a feisty little brunette gave me a listening ear and mind-blowing orgasms.
Sighing, I grab my phone to see who might want to hang out tonight. I never realized how much time Jax and I spend together until he wasn't around.
But a missed call and text message catch my eye. I open the message with a frown, wondering why Aiden would've called me.
Aiden: Hey man, people are gonna start showing up at the house at 9 if you feel like coming over. It'll be chill, just some drinks and maybe a fire out back. Text me if you need the address.
I completely forgot Aiden invited me to his party tonight. I wince and rub my temple. House parties remind me of college kids, which I was never really a big fan of. Also, lots of talking. At least at the bars I don't have to make conversation, and I can slip out without being noticed.
But with a sigh, I decide this is probably as good an opportunity as ever to put some time in with the team. If Aiden invited me that means there's going to be a few others from the gym, so at least I'll have some people to talk to about fighting. I'm not big on socializing with the students since I enjoy being the stoic, no-bullshit coach that keeps his distance, but there is such a thing as too distant. An hour at a party will give me a chance to spend some time with them and prove I’m not a total asshole.
I tuck my phone in my bag and head for the showers, ignoring the little voice in the back of my mind that's whispering I'm only going to the party in the hopes of seeing one particular student.
* * *
I walk into the townhouse and immediately remember that there is a very valid reason that I don't do house parties. It feels like I've walked into the middle of Hipsterville.
There are people scattered all over the couches in the living room and crowded around the bar in the kitchen. I even notice the people smoking in the backyard through the open back door beyond the kitchen. I recognize a few people from the gym but for the most part, this is a party of freshly graduated, lost-in-the-world twenty-three-year-olds that are getting together to smoke weed and talk about problems they know nothing about. Not exactly my ideal crowd.
But when I spot Aiden in the kitchen, I plaster a smile on my face and make my way over to him.
"Hey man, you made it! Can I get you a beer?" Aiden gives me an overly excited fist bump, his grin stretching from ear to ear. I make a mental note that although I'm most likely going to have a terrible time here, it makes a big difference for team morality when I spend time with the guys. My smile becomes a little more authentic.
"Yeah, a beer would be great, thanks. Who's coming from the gym?" I look around the first floor, trying to decide who will be the easiest to spend the next hour with.
Aiden opens the fridge but looks thoughtfully over the door as he thinks about his answer. "Uh, Max's here somewhere, so is Lucy, but I don't think Remy is coming. Two of the new fighters are here too, Dane and Pete.”