She gave a small smile, and I felt a swelling in my chest that maybe she was cheering up, hopeful that things would be okay. We sat in silence eating our food. Finally, I spoke again.
“Jasmine, I know I’ve fucked things up and I’m really sorry. I’m going to try to make things right. I’ll talk to Lucy and ask her for some space. I know it’s a lot to ask from both of you, but I really need some time to digest everything. Deciding the one person to spend the rest of your life with is a huge decision and none of us should make it lightly. I don’t think what I’m asking is unreasonable. We have plenty of time to mate and get married. All of us are really young. There’s no reason we can’t take a few weeks or months to figure it out. And, who knows, maybe Lucy will meet her own mate during that time, and then we’ll all really understand our options.”
“I spoke with the priest earlier this week,” Jasmine replied.
“What did he say?”
“He said that the temple forbids taking a chosen mate over a fated one, and that by doing so, I wouldn’t be allowed to be married in the temple. He also said it’s believed that the Moon Goddess curses those who take a chosen mate.”
I sighed, considering what she was telling me, not knowing how to respond, certain that a temple wedding would be important to Jasmine and her parents. After all, her whole family attended every week. I also reflected on what my own parents would think if I wasn’t allowed to be married in the temple. They had always been adamant about following temple traditions, especially as leaders in the community. I knew my mom would be pretty upset, but I was sure she’d eventually get over it. Although religious, my parents had always been understanding. Either way, I couldn’t choose my mate based on what my parents thought—they weren’t the ones marrying them!
We continued eating our food silently. Finally, Jasmine spoke again. “I’ve thought about it, and I don’t think what you’re asking for is unreasonable. It just hurts. We’re supposed to be together. Artemis wants us to be together. I won’t get another mate if you reject me. It would be one thing if we were human and we had no idea who we’re supposed to be with, but in this case, we do. The Moon Goddess tells us. And I feel like there must be something severely wrong with me for you to consider rejecting me given that information.” Her voice cracked as she completed the sentence and tears spilled from her eyes.
I moved my chair closer and wrapped my arms around her, allowing her to cry into my chest, her pain sinking into my bones. I didn’t want to hurt Jasmine, but I also didn’t want to lead her on either, going along with the mate bond even if my heart wasn’t into it. I did feel a lot for her, especially now with my arms wrapped around her, her head against my chest. Whenever we were close to each other like this, it was like a magnet pulling me toward her, making it impossible to imagine myself away from her. That’s why I needed space. I needed to clear my head and figure out what I should do—do what was expected of me and be with Jasmine or follow my heart and be with Lucy.
Finally, I replied, “No, that’s not true, Jasmine. There’s absolutely nothing wrong with you. You’re perfect. If I had never met Lucy, there would be no question and I would have been over the moon to have you as my mate. But I can’t change the past. I made mistakes and I have baggage now. You don’t deserve any of this, but I also can’t change how I feel about Lucy now that I feel it. I’m going to do my best to do the right thing. Please, just give me some time.”
She nodded into my chest and lifted her head up. “I’m going to go home. Thanks for getting me some clothes and my stuff.”
I stared into her amber eyes, the whites red, her face blotchy. My chest ached seeing her like this. But I wasn’t sure how to fix the situation without being disingenuous. I just hoped that time would fix everything that had gone wrong in the past week.
“Do you need a ride?” I asked, getting up and putting my hand out to help her up.
“No, it’s okay, I’ll just walk over to the café to get my car. It’s not far from here. Plus, it’s best if Lucy doesn’t see me with you.” She ignored my hand and walked toward the front of the packhouse.
I followed her to the door and watched her walk down the street. I closed the door to find Blake looking at me with his arms crossed. He shook his head at me and said, “You’re a fucking idiot.” And then he walked away.
Chapter 32
Blake
Itwasmid-October,andLuke had put the new training requirements in place. I checked the sparring rosters to see who was signed up. I noted that Jasmine had enrolled in a two-hour stint that day and got an idea. I mindlinked the trainer that was leading that session and asked to switch with him. It had been a while since I’d heard from her, and I missed her. This was a harmless way I could spend some time with her. Plus, I couldn’t lie. Watching her fight was really fucking hot. I still vividly recalled that day when we had sparred together.
I walked out on the field, my heart skipping a beat when I saw Jasmine. She was wearing a tight-fitting gym outfit that showed off her entire body. She looked so sexy I almost forgot what I was there to do. Coming back to reality, I began leading everyone in the warm-up. I had everyone do push-ups, planks, and burpees. I couldn’t help watching how good Jasmine looked performing all the exercises as I barked orders at everyone.
To begin the session, I decided to have everyone practice the wolfman’s carry. This was essentially the wolf version of a fireman’s carry and was important for warriors to be proficient in during battle. When wolves became too weak, they were forced back into their human form, and we had to be able to carry them off the battlefield to safety. I had all the civilians that came that day stay in their human forms while the warriors all shifted into wolves and practiced flipping them onto their backs.
I watched in delight as Jasmine giggled while one of the female warriors practiced the exercise with her, thinking she looked so cute. Jasmine would lay on the ground, and the warrior used her snout to flip Jasmine onto her and secure her by holding Jasmine’s arms in her mouth, giving a little shake to make sure she was safely in place. Jasmine was clearly enjoying herself, and I could already picture her as part of the warrior team.
After I was satisfied that the warriors had done a solid job, I began assigning everyone partners for sparring. I decided to pair Jasmine with Logan. He was a big man and one of my best warriors. While he could easily overpower Jasmine in a fight, I knew she was a fair match for him in technique. I was looking forward to watching her take him on.
We started with practicing the ground and pound, a move meant to bring one’s opponent to the ground and pound them with one’s fist. Everyone’s opponents were supposed to avoid being taken. I walked around, observing and correcting anything I saw. Logan went first with trying to ground Jasmine. I was excited to see that Jasmine did a great job outsmarting him, not getting grounded most times that he tried. I had everyone switch and was amazed to see that Jasmine was a quick thinker. She outmaneuvered all of his blocks and was able to ground him most of the time. Hot damn!
I began shouting out other sparring moves, and it was the same. If Logan had been allowed to use all of his strength, he would have likely knocked her out in at least one of the blows he made. But because this was more of an exercise in technique, Jasmine was outperforming him. I could see that he was becoming frustrated. I, on the other hand, was getting extremely turned on.
After running through additional moves, I decided to end the sparring session with the spinning backfist. Everyone was supposed to spin and try to hit their opponent with the back of their fist, the spin allowing one to generate more force from the punch. Jasmine went first, and it was amazing. Most of her punches landed. This was not an easy move to master, and most people missed most of the time. But she was quick on her feet. We then switched and Logan struggled. Most of his punches missed. I could see that he was growing very frustrated.
Suddenly, I noticed something in his eyes. I knew he sometimes had trouble controlling his anger, but I didn’t think that would happen during a sparring exercise. Before I could stop the exercise, he spun and threw a punch with full force, throwing Jasmine back. Everyone gasped, noticing what happened. I shifted into my wolf in anger, tearing my clothes, and attacked him. I grabbed him by the center of his body with my mouth, swinging him violently and throwing him into the grass. I had to stop myself from killing him I was so pissed.
I went over to Jasmine and whimpered, seeing that he had left her with a huge black eye. I mindlinked Logan,“Get the fuck out of here before I actually fucking kill you.”He got up and ran off the field, bleeding from his middle. I knew he’d be fine and heal quickly. Jasmine would too.
One of the warriors handed me a fresh pair of shorts. Because Jasmine was present, I went behind the partition to shift back into my human form, thinking I should stay modest in front of her, even though I normally wouldn’t have bothered. I came out and yelled at everyone, “If anyone else ever fucking pulls that again, I will personally escort you to the cells and torture you. We have non-warriors sparring with us now, and it’s unacceptable to use full force during these sessions. Dismissed!” Everyone walked away as Jasmine slowly got up. I went over to help.
“Are you okay?” I asked.
“Yeah, I’m fine. Just wasn’t expecting that.”
“Let’s get some ice for that.” I took her hand and brought her into the warrior gym. I sat her down on a bench while I went to grab an ice pack from the men’s locker room fridge.