Maybe if I continue painting him as the devil, I’ll find the will to move past him.
Anni releases the straw and stares up. “For as long as I’ve been alive? He’s six years older than me, so ever since I was born, it’s felt as if I’ve had a guard from hell. No, a guardian angel.”
“Those are entirely different.”
“I hate when he confiscates my freedom, but I know he’s doing it because he cares about my safety. We…were born into a cruel world, and Jeremy suffered in it more than I did, so I guess he takes security very seriously and I love him as a brother. I just don’t like him as Papa’s heir sometimes.”
I rub the side of my nose.
Of course.
Jeremy is meant to be a mafia leader one day. That’s his destiny that he can’t escape even if he wants to. Considering all the violence he takes part in, I suspect he doesn’t.
That should be enough to make me forget about him.
Move on.
Even if my body refuses to erase his touch.
I grab a bottle of beer and chug half of it down.
“OMG.” Ava leaves Remi alone and wipes the side of my face. “Why are you drinking?”
“Last I checked, you’re not the only one who can.”
“You’re a lightweight, remember?”
“Leave me alone.” I swat her away as if she’s a fly.
“Yeah, leave her alone. Drunk Ces is much less uptight than sober Ces, and we love that beautiful bitch.” Remi clinks his bottle against mine. “Cheers to a truce!”
I drink the other half the bottle in one go and wince at the burn. They’re right. I don’t usually do this, but I’m safe here with them. If I somehow pass out, Ava will tuck me in.
While I avoid drink as to not repeat that black night, I don’t mind if it’s with people I trust.
It takes exactly three beers for my muscles to loosen, and I start grinning like an idiot.
Truth is, Remi is actually a clown and he’s funny. I’m just much harder on him when I’m sober, because he keeps calling me names.
We start singing karaoke, and I stand up to jump along to the music while hugging Ava and Anni, but immediately, the room starts swaying. Or I do.
Ava grabs me by the arm and snatches the beer from my hand. “No more drinks for you, lady.”
“Nooo, let me be.”
“Yeah, let her be.” Remi appears like a devil on my left. “Drunk Cecy is fun Cecy!”
I narrow my eyes on him. “I’m not a prude.”
He grins. “Wanna be in my next orgy?”
“Hmph. I’m into something way better than that.” I pull on his ear. “Wanna know what?”
“Fuck yeah. I’m all for kinks.”
“Forget it.” My shoulders slump. “I’m too cowardly to try it again.”
“You can just un-coward yourself.” He waggles his brows. “I can help.”