He’s a beast, but he’s the beast who breathes life into me.
He’s the beast who’d slaughter the world to pieces just to protect me from it.
He’s my beast.
I just have no idea what I am to him.
34
JEREMY
“What are we doing here?”
The sound of Cecily's spooked voice makes me smile. I don’t mean to. It just happens.
A lot of things about her make me smile. Whether it’s her silly psychoanalyzing of fictional characters, her attachment to said characters, or the expression she makes when she’s caught off guard.
Like right now.
I hop off my bike and throw the helmet into the hands of an awaiting Ilya. He nods at me, then at Cecily, whose brows have lifted to nearly touch her hairline.
She doesn’t blink or react as I grab her hand and start to guide her into the mansion. It isn’t until we’re at the threshold that she physically shakes her head and draws us to a stop.
“Seriously. What are we doing here?”
“Didn’t you ask the other day why I never bring you here?”
Her throat works with a swallow and her hand grows slack in mine. She’s so close that I can see the tiny freckles dusting her cheeks, the smudge of darker roots in her silver hair, and breathe in her scent.
Fucking water lilies. I never thought I’d be as entranced by a scent as I am with Cecily’s.
I’ve never liked anyone enough to focus on them, to want to learn more about them, to engrave myself so deep beneath their skin that they can’t remove me unless they cut themselves open and bleed.
And yet, those are the exact thoughts I’ve been having about this woman.
“That was…just a figurative question.” She stares at Ilya, who’s following close behind. “Does he take everything so literally?”
My guard nods. “When it comes to you, I’m afraid yes.”
“We need to fix that about him.”
“Stop talking about me as if I’m not here.” I grab her chin and rotate her attention back to me. “Do not speak to Ilya when you can ask me.”
“Oh, please. You need help.”
My fingers flex on her throat and she shivers, going slightly up on her tiptoes, which is usually an invitation for me to fuck her brains out.
“Behave.” I groan deep in my throat, then I take her hand in mine again, because if I don’t stop touching her throat, I’ll be tempted to throw away whatever I’m trying to do and eat her out for dinner.
We’re not two steps in when she stops again. “I was only wondering. We don’t have to be here.”
“I don’t see why we shouldn’t be, and you weren’t only wondering. You felt left out of an important part of my life, the Heathens, and you’re here because you’re not my dirty little secret.”
Her lips part the slightest bit, like whenever I do something unusual and she’s stunned into silence.
I use that chance to drag her in with me.
She’s still shocked about my words and actions during these past two weeks. Ever since Annika and Creighton came back without either of them being hurt, I’ve found time to focus on more important things.