“Yes?”
Ruth was not often hesitant with Felicity. It made her nervous that she was being so in this conversation.
“What happens when you fall in love with this Benjamin, and your mother promises you to someone else?”
“Who mentioned anything about love? I do not think that will happen. We are only becoming friends. Besides, do you really think Mother would betroth me to a man without telling me first?”
“It would not be the worst thing she had done to you.”
Felicity sobered at the thought, all excitement over her plans dashed. Felicity knew Ruth found the pressures her mother placed on Felicity to be too much for a girl. While Ruth didn’t know the extent of the Kent family’s financial struggles, she had dried many of Felicity’s tears as she cried over marrying for money.
“I will be careful,” Felicity told Ruth with resolve. “I will not let myself fall in love with him. He is a friend and no more. He can be no more as a second son.”
Ruth let out a deep sigh before saying, “I wish it were not this way.”
“As do I, Ruth. But this is the way it is, and we must make the best of it. I simply will not allow myself to get carried away.”
Ruth nodded, not quite believing her. Felicity didn’t know if she believed herself. She was two letters in and could already feel herself falling for the man from the veranda.
CHAPTER6
Dear Mister Chapman,
You are full of surprises. First, excellent conversation amidst a dreadful ball, then an apology letter, and now, a second letter asking for my opinions. I think we will get along quite well. As for your questions, I will answer them in the order you asked.
I believe that the idea behind labeling a Diamond of the season was started with good intentions. To be singled out as the Queen’s favorite opens doors and prospects a young woman might not otherwise have. I do fear, however, that has been twisted into something much less benevolent. Now, the honor has strings attached. The Queen’s tastes cannot be proven wrong, and her expectations must be met. To that end, it adds the pressure not to let her, or the rest of society, down. I do not think others ever stop and ask the Diamond how it feels to be labeled as such, so they are blissfully unaware of the pressures it comes with. I will not repeat the sentiments I have already shared with you about being the Diamond, but I will ask, when you speak of pressures you have in your own life, what do you mean, exactly?
As for the social season, I am afraid I will be of no use to you. My mother is the only one to receive and respond to invitations. I often am unaware of any plans we may have until it is time to get ready for them. However, my mother is very aware of the image we present as a family, so we are rarely allowed to miss an event. Whichever invitation you accept, I am almost certain we will see each other again. I have heard that your brother is a bit of a social hermit, rarely attending any of the season’s many offerings. Do you follow in his footsteps or are you more of a social butterfly? (I think I already know the answer, seeing as you were alone on the veranda when we first met, but I would like your answer nonetheless.)
And next, to answer your questions about the dance. I must admit, I struggled to enjoy the Leisure Ball. I found it overly crowded and with too many bachelors who like only to talk about themselves, save for one. Us ladies spend hours in dance lessons, practicing our steps, only to have our toes smashed in by the same men who thought they were above taking lessons of their own. Are you one of these men? Or can you dance well? Despite all of this, I must say, I enjoyed the evening. I don’t know how, given all of the critiques I have just shared, but there is something about a ball that enchants a girl. In all of those dance lessons, we picture ourselves in resplendent gowns with a prince offering his hand. There is something to be said for the chance that the next man I dance with could be my very own prince. Which brings me to your last question.
I have heard it said by many that, when it comes to knowing who would be a good fit as a spouse, you know very quickly. Not like the idea of love at first sight, but sometimes, a two-minute dance with conversations interrupted by dance steps can be enough to know. I certainly have known after two minutes who I don’t want to spend another second with. I think the time one may spend courting and calling before getting engaged is for those who cannot make up their minds and the others who want to appease societal norms. Do you think you could know after one conversation that a woman would be a good wife for you? Or do you need the extra time to make that decision?
Thank you for the compliments. I know now I can take you at your word, so I will treasure the ones you give me. Your father sounds like a great man. Tell me about him?
Your friend,
Felicity Kent
* * *
It didn’t take long for Felicity and Ruth to put their plans to the test. Benjamin had sent her a response before dinner the same day. Knowing that it was foolish to hope she would get a response so soon after she sent her letter, Felicity chided herself even as she picked up the book and flipped through the pages, looking for an envelope from him. It fell from the book and onto the floor at her feet. She had just bent to pick it up when her door swung open.
Felicity, my dear?” her mother called. “Whatever are you doing down there?”
Not wanting her mother to find the note, Felicity stood, kicking the envelope further under her bed, clutching the book to her chest.
“Oh, mother, I didn’t hear you coming.” Felicity walked to meet her mother in the middle of her room, trying to keep her voice even. “My book fell off the table. I only bent to retrieve it.”
“My dear,” her mother said, forgetting about the book altogether, “you are spending too much time locked up in your room alone. There are dozens of men interested in you, and instead of securing an engagement, you are hiding in the pages of a book, dreaming about a reality that cannot be.”
If you knew how true that statement really was, you would be much more upset than you are right now.
“I do not understand why I have to constantly remind you of the importance of you ending the season married. Your sister’s security is wholly dependent on your success. You will have plenty of time to waste your days reading once you are married.”
“I have not forgotten, Mother,” Felicity said, a little sharper than she had intended.
Her mother narrowed her gaze, staring intensely at Felicity. It was unlike Felicity to argue with her mother; she typically left that up to Delilah. If she was going to keep her mother from suspecting anything, she needed to do a better job of acting as if there was nothing happening out of the ordinary.