“Nothing that isn’t true, Ben. No one has seen Elijah all season. And while he wasn’t known for attending many events of the season, he certainly made sure to attendsomeof them. It is odd for him to have not yet made an appearance.”
Benjamin sighed as the tension between his shoulders grew.
“You may not have the time you had hoped you would get before announcing his passing. And you can’t let Miss Kent find out through someone else that the man she has been exchanging letters with is no longer a simple military man but a duke.”
Benjamin knew his friend was right. If he had only weeks to prepare for the announcement to be made that he was now the Duke of Ferndown, he would have to tell her soon. He made up his mind that he would tell her in the next letter, no matter what, and hope she understood.
CHAPTER5
Dear Miss Kent,
When I wrote my first letter to you, I was not expecting a reply. I am grateful to know I have your forgiveness. As for your hasty exit, I do not blame you for wanting to flee my presence. Let’s just call it even, shall we? I know well what it feels like to be under immense pressure, and I hate that I might have added to that. Why do you think it is that the Queen insists on bestowing some unlucky lady the title of Diamond of the Season when it makes the season that much more difficult?
I must admit that when I read of how you thought of me as a skilled conversationalist, I laughed much harder than is dignified. I do believe you are the first person to ever tell me that you enjoyed our conversation. I would like to think that my family and friends do not find our conversations a bore, but they have never said anything one way or another, so I cannot be sure. I find I am an excellent listener as I can rarely come up with the right words to say in the moment, but it was particularly easy to listen to you. All this to say, I too am looking forward to our next meeting. Do you keep a busy social calendar for the season? I am unsure of which invitations I should accept and which I should graciously deny. I would appreciate any insight you might have on this.
It seems that you were quite the popular dance partner at the Leisure Ball. I spent at least an hour waiting for a moment where I might have apologized to you for the things I said, but you were never without company. Did you enjoy your time? Personally, I find dancing an inconvenient way to get to know someone. How can you decide if the person you’re dancing with is someone worth pursuing in a matter of minutes, especially when every other step you are facing away from each other?
Lastly, I wish to address your concerns over the sincerity of my compliments. I hope that, as you get to know me, you come to find I am a man who means what I say. I do not use words lightly, so when I tell you that you are lovely, it is because you are, and I feel it is necessary for me to communicate that with you. My father always taught me that a man’s value is only in his ability to keep his word. I hope I am the kind of person who does that well.
I look forward to hearing from you,
B.C.
* * *
Felicity was just as caught off guard to get the second letter as she had been the first. This time, Ruth brought it to her on her breakfast tray tucked under a napkin. It was unlike Felicity to break her fast in her room as she preferred sitting at the table to eat, but she suspected Ruth was trying to help her conceal her correspondence. The night after tea with the Abotts, Felicity told Ruth all that had been said about Benjamin, unable to hide her disappointment.
“Are you going to sit and pout all night, or will you tell me what’s wrong?” Ruth asked casually while brushing out Felicity’s hair.
“I feel silly, Ruth.” She sighed as she tried to decide where to start. “Do you remember the letter I got this morning?”
“Yes. It’s the second one in as many days. And after you asked me to help get a letter out yesterday without anyone knowing, I knew something was going on.”
“It was from a man I met at the Leisure Ball. He was wonderful, just wonderful. Unfortunately, I got my feelings hurt at something he had said, but then he wrote to me to apologize. We have struck up a bit of a correspondence. I asked about him today at tea, curious. Mother and Lady Abbott went on and on about how he was not worth my time as he does not have a title. I can’t understand the way they believed he could be so bad when he was so kind.”
“And you want to keep writing to him?” Ruth asked, seeing straight to the problem.
“Yes,” Felicity answered honestly. “He is the first man I have met who does not inspire dread at the thought of marriage.”
“Well then,” Ruth said, putting the brush down and meeting Felicity’s eyes in the reflection of the mirror, “we must keep these letters hidden. No one else knows of them as the postal boy handed the mail directly to me. We will do what we can to ensure your mother doesn’t find them.”
As Felicity laid in her bed thinking through how she would respond to Benjamin, she was more than grateful she had a friend to help keep her secrets.
The next morning when Ruth had entered with two of the other maids on her heels, Felicity did her best to act normally. She pretended she didn’t see the corner of the envelope peeking out from under her napkin as the maids fussed over the room — drawing the curtains, stoking the fire, and pulling out the dress Felicity would wear today. It wasn’t until after Felicity had eaten, was dressed with her hair pinned into place, and was sitting in the window that she tore into the letter.
This time, she didn’t hesitate to write her reply. It took her half the time to reply to this letter as it had the first. She found it easy to fill the first page as she answered his questions. She loved the way he had asked for her opinion instead of telling her how she should feel about it all. She tried to slip her own questions into the mix as she wanted to know more about him too. She wanted to know more about the father he had mentioned and the pressure he had felt.
Trying to sneak her response to Ruth had been exhilarating. Her heart pounded in her chest as she slipped into the kitchen under the guise of returning her tray. It wasn’t unheard of for Felicity to make these small trips to save the maids the hassle of it all, so she hoped her appearance would go unnoticed. On her way out of the kitchen, she gave Ruth a pointed look at the napkin, only leaving once Ruth had returned the nod.
Felicity spent the rest of the day on edge. She didn’t know when Ruth would find the time to deliver her letter or get it to the post office. She knew it would be unrealistic to expect his response today, and yet she looked hopefully towards the door anytime the knob turned. After the third time Felicity had to rip out her uneven stitches, Delilah turned towards her.
“What is wrong with you?” she whispered, keeping her voice low so their mother couldn’t hear them.
In their usual arrangement, her mother sat across from them in her favorite small pink chair. The seat had been labeled her favorite the moment they walked into the home as if she had spent years sitting there instead of weeks. Felicity and Delilah sat side by side on the deep maroon striped settee, a wicker box full of embroidery hoops, thread, and needles in between them. They had been in her mother’s parlor, waiting for more callers for the last hour, and Felicity had yet to make any progress on her embroidery.
“Nothing,” Felicity whispered back, hoping her sister would get the hint and leave it alone.
Unfortunately, Delilah seemed oblivious to Felicity's signal to not draw attention to her. Their whispered words had traveled the distance between where they sat to where her mother sat.