Could he give her that? Play and nothing else? Keep the emotions out of it?
He doubted it. His emotions were already involved when it came to this woman. She owned him whether she knew it or not. “You want to be my submissive?”
Her gaze met his again and he saw something there he didn’t want to hope for. He shouldn’t want her to say yes. He shouldn’t want any of this. “Yes.” She placed her palm flat on his chest and toyed with one of the buttons on his shirt. “I...” She looked down, then back up again. “I want to be the only sub you play with, though.”
Daniel swallowed. He played with a lot of subs at the club. He was the best flogger and subs often approached him, wanting him to flog them. She’d never asked him, though. Not directly, anyway. Ali would say she wanted to play, and so he would find another Dom to play with her. Every time it nearly killed him, but he did it knowing it was the right thing for Ali. But now, she was standing in front of him asking if he would take care of her needs.
“You don’t want to play with other Doms at the club?” Saying the words left a sour taste in his mouth, but this wasn’t about him. Ali’s happiness was all that mattered.
“No. Just you.”
His heart felt as if it would burst from his chest. He wanted this more than anything, even though he shouldn’t. But as usual, he couldn’t say no to her.
He cupped her face and pressed a soft kiss to her lips. “Send me your list.”
She smiled. “Hold on.”
Then she was out of his arms, leaving him feeling emptier than he had in a long time. The more he touched her, the more he wanted to touch her. But he had to set some boundaries. For her sake as well as his own.
Ali returned a few minutes later holding a printout of her limits list. She handed it to him, then went to where their uneaten plates of food sat on her table. He’d completely forgotten about dinner.
“I’ll go warm these up in the microwave for us.” She ducked into her kitchen, leaving him to look over her limits list.
Daniel tried to concentrate on the long list of items she’d marked, but it was difficult when he could hear her in the other room. He needed to look at her list, but his body didn’t care much about anything except getting his hands on her again. Of course, that was fighting with the part of his brain that was still yelling at him about how wrong it all was.
The microwave dinged, and he heard her moving things around. He shook his head and read over the first page for the tenth time. Because he’d arranged for her to play with other Doms at the club in the past, he knew a lot of her limits. Or at least, the tamer ones. But Ali had some kinks on here he wasn’t aware of.
She strolled out of the kitchen a few minutes later with a plate in each hand. “I’ll get us some water.”
Taking a seat in front of one of the plates, he put her list aside for the time being. It would be easier to look over when he was alone.
Ali handed him a glass of water and sat down beside him. She glanced over at him before picking up her fork. “Can I ask you something?”
“Of course.” His response was automatic, but once it was out there, he wondered what she’d want to know.
“Is that why you wouldn’t play with me at the club? Because of the age thing, I mean.”
“Yes.” That and because if he played with her, he knew it would only increase his feelings for her.
She thought about that while chewing some of her food. “That explains a lot.”
It was his turn to be confused. “It does?”
Ali nodded. “I always thought you weren’t interested in me sexually. That you thought of me as more of a sister type. But both Kim and Justin said you wanted to play with me but were holding back for some reason.”
Apparently, he must not have been hiding his interest as much as he thought. “I don’t think of you as a sister.”
She smiled. “Good.”
He wasn’t so sure about that. It would be much easier if he did think of her as a sister.
Before he could think of what to say next, there was a noise from the apartment next door. It sounded like something, or someone was being slammed against the adjoining wall. It happed twice more, and then he heard a woman’s voice yell, “Yes! Harder!”
He looked at Ali, raising his eyebrows in question. “Your neighbors?”
“My neighbors.”
It was impossible to continue their conversation over the racket coming from next door. It was no wonder Ali couldn’t sleep if that was what she heard every night. He couldn’t remember the last time he’d heard a scene at the club that loud and that was saying something.