“English,” he growls again, this time slipping his thumb into my mouth. His finger is bitter and perfect. I seal my lips around it and let my eyes close, my lower half clenching at the memory of sucking his cock.
Opening my eyes, I smile at him, and I love that he doesn’t return the smile. He glares down, plus a single wink.
“I’m ready for us.”
His groan is so deep-rooted that I feel it in his belly as he brings our bodies together in an intense, fusing hug. I inhale his scent and bask in the feeling of pure adoration and safety.
Atti likes me for me, and he doesn’t mind watching me work through my shit. And that is… invaluable to me. I break our hug and link our fingers, bringing his hand to my lips. I kiss his knuckles, and that’s when I notice… they’re black and blue, swollen and scratched, and…
I look up at him, a twisted knot of confusion in my throat. “Was it you?” I ask, suddenly aware of exactly why Reynold Porter had a change of heart.
He grunts and wraps his palm around my throat, dragging my face to his. My pussy seizes at the aggressive, uniquely Atticus gesture. I place my hand over his, both of us grabbing my throat. His lips brush mine, and our foreheads come together.
“You’re mine now, Goldie. That means every wrong in your life is mine to right.” Our mouths come together in a heated, tongue-heavy kiss, and I don’t know if he initiated it or if I did, but I moan into his spread mouth as my body softens against his.
“It was you,” I say, trying to calibrate as he releases me.
“It willalwaysbe me.”
With a step backward, I put a bit of needed space between us. It’s romantic, yes, but my logical brain is screamingwhy didn’t you tell me?I have to know. “Why didn’t you tell me?”
His brows come together for just a moment before stoic Atti comes back. “You woulda said no.”
“No,” I shake my head. “Notwhy didn’t you ask me for permission. Why didn’t you tell me you did that? That you went and saw the one man I never want to see again?”
I take another step back, because I need more space. “If I wouldn’t have asked just now, would you have told me?” My eyes warm with frustration. “Would you have told me? Or did you think you could decide for me?”
He levels a hand between us. “Hold up.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t ask you to do it, and I couldn’t have stopped you, that much I know. But you could have told me.” I press my fingers to my temples in an attempt to make sense of all the racing thoughts. Beck seemed… “Even Beck and Beau knew. They knew my story before I did, Atticus, because you didn’t tell me.”
“I didn’t tell them,” he defends.
“But they knew. Whether they put it together on their own or not, they had the pieces to do it. Our friends knew you went to Reynold before me. Don’t you see a problem with that? And then having all this shit sent to my work…” My eyes get a little fuzzy as I pull my coat tightly around myself. “You didn’t think about what me receiving all of that at work would be like, did you?”
His head falls forward as he drags an inked hand through his beard. With a sigh, he finds my gaze. “I shoulda told you. And I shouldn’t have sent it to your work. You’re right. I didn’t think. I’m sorry Goldie. I thought it’d be easier for you to get it at work instead of your house. I thought.. Hell, I guess I just thought if you got it at work, you wouldn’t break down.”
“I broke down in the grocery store parking lot, Atticus. It happens to me, I don’t get to choose where I am when it does.”
He takes my hand, and I let him. “I’m sorry. I fucked up by not tellin’ you and by sending it here. I know that. I promise I won’t keep anything from you ever again. You have my word.”
I stare into his eyes at the dark calm hiding there. The anger rolling through my blood dwindles as his thumb strokes the top of my hand. “I’m sorry, I only meant to make your life better, not to upset you.”
I believe him. Taking a breath, I close the distance between us and let him bring me to his body in a hug. “Thank you for apologizing.”
His voice rumbles through me when he asks, “did it upset you? The delivery?”
I nod honestly. “A little but now I can get closure because now… it’s over.”
He kisses the top of my head. “Are we okay? That’s all I care about.”
He apologized and I accepted it. In his arms, I feel his love. I know he meant well. I know he will always do what’s best for me.
I know he’s right; it willalwaysbe him.
twenty
atticus