Firing her would ensure I returned to my status quo by tomorrow. Maybe I’d be licking my wounds for awhile, but doing the right thing didn’t always come easy.
These were the sacrifices required for my kind of life.
Despite the rationalizations, it took me hours to rally. I dreaded this task, more than almost anything I’d ever done. I knew it would hurt. It would sting. It would haunt me at night when my thoughts grew too loud. But it had to be done.
For the sake of my sanity. For my stability. For the future of my company.
I finally made it down to the office after lunch. My legs felt leaden, but I powered through. Jessa’s crystal blues found mine as soon as I rounded the corner into the hallway and my stomach bottomed out. I couldn’t fire her. Something wasn’t right.
I cleared my throat as I breezed past her desk. “Jessa, can you come into my office?”
Here went nothing.
I rounded my desk, and Jessa was in front of me a moment later, looking every grade of nervous.
“What’s up, Damian?” She sat facing me, nibbling at her bottom lip as she fanned her dress out around her. I struggled not to notice her. I stared at my computer screen, groping for the right words. Waiting for anything to come to me.
You can’t do this. It’s not right. Something is off.
That intuitive sentiment warred with the pulsing need to get back on track. To return to the hard-won stability I’d enjoyed before she’d shown up and rocked me off my foundation.
I’d wanted to help her, to help her family. I’d done that. Now, I needed to help myself. I needed to get back to safety. To solitude. To the depressing aloneness I’d convinced myself was the only path forward.
“I don’t know how to say this,” I started.
She drew a shaky breath. “Oh God.”
I steepled my fingers, finally daring to meet her gaze.Just do it. Get it over with. “I think it’s time for us to part ways professionally.” Hurt slashed through her gaze, making my chest tighten. But I forced myself to not look away. To come across as firmly as possible. This would be final. “A few things have come to my attention recently. You haven’t been performing up to expectations. And given the recent information breach, there isn’t much doubt about where it came from.”
Her eyes were so wide I thought they might pop out of her head. She didn’t move for what felt like a full minute.
“What are you talking about, Damian? What information breach?”
“Private information is leaking out of this office. Family issues. I’m not pointing fingers, but we are restructuring as a result. I’m sorry this had to happen. We’ll offer you a severance package to make the transition easier. You’ll find it to be pretty generous.”
She cupped her cheeks in her hands, staring at me like I’d just grown a third head. “Am I having a nightmare right now? What is going on?”
“We can have someone pack your desk up for you if you’d like to avoid the spectacle.” I turned my gaze to my computer. Her reaction reflected my internal state, and I didn’t need any more of it. “Otherwise you’re free to go.”
Her mouth turned into a frighteningly thin line. She stared at me so hard, it was like she could see through me. “Why are you saying all of this? Do you think I leaked something? Damian, I never shared anything with anyone. I swear to God above. What happened? What did I do to make you think—”
“Jessa, this is a company decision. I appreciate what you did while you were here, but there’s an element of liability I have to consider.” I paused, forcing myself to meet her gaze. “Your new roommate works forBig Apple Mag. They’re the ones who published the last two exposés about our personal lives, within the last two weeks. Follow the trail, Jessa. It’s obvious.”
Her mouth opened and closed, but nothing came out. Finally, she forced out, “But…I never…there wasn’t…”
“It’s done, Jessa. I’m sorry. You can leave now.”
Her bottom lip quivered and she tore out of my office. Once the door shut behind her, I rested my face in my hands. My heart still pounded, every inch of my body feeling gelatinous and foreign.
But I’d done it. The band-aid had been ripped off.
And now things could start getting back to normal.
CHAPTER TWENTY-SEVEN
JESSA
Back at my apartment, I didn’t know what to do first.