Chapter6
Aurora decided to meet Sullivan alone the next day. She had sent for him at dawn, after a troubling sleep recounting the events of the night before. On the surface their kiss should have no lingering consequences. It was never proper for a woman to be alone with a gentleman, though, and yet having anyone overhear there had been a foolish flirtation between them last night wouldn’t be, either. So, she waited in the small parlor at Wharton House for Lord Sullivan without a servant attending her.
Although she told herself their meeting today should unfold just like any other had in the past, part of her knew it would be different. Pleasantries would be uttered, a dead wife and son mentioned, and then a continued discussion of his search for his elusive bride could take place—hopefully ignoring last night’s amorous encounter.
But first they had to get past any lingering misunderstandings left over from yesterday’s carriage ride. It was essential they clear the air if she was to be any help to him. She wanted to make sure he had formed no wrong conclusions about her character, and hopefully he would understand it had been a one-time mistake. Then he could go back to his search for a suitable bride who would accept coming second to a ghost.
She wrinkled her nose. She couldn’t really help him unless he was willing to help himself. Clearly, he needed to find an outlet for his pent-up passions if he thought kissing his matchmaker was a good idea.
When the butler announced he had arrived, she believed she was ready. Calm. Perfectly poised like the proper young lady she wanted everyone in society to believe her to be. And she was…until the man strode across the room wearing a huge grin just for her.
Her heart skipped a beat, her knees trembled, along with higher parts that quivered, as he swept into a deep, respectful bow. He rushed forward, reaching for her hand. “Miss Hillcrest, you always look lovely in blue. You must know it’s my favorite color?”
Her smile faltered as she stared up into his face, surprised by his lie. But she managed to hold her hands together at her waist and kept them there until his outstretched hand fell. “Your favorite color is green, my lord. You always wear it, or brown.”
His eyes sparkled, and her heart lurched again for having mentioned knowing that about him. “So I do, and so clever of you to notice my preference for muted colors. Blue is my favorite color on you, though. It brings out the intelligence in your eyes.”
She narrowed her eyes on him, unwilling to fall for flattery so early in the day. She was wearing a plain round gown. Nothing too fine for the occasion of their meeting to be considered remarkable. “Then you see something no one else has ever made mention of, without expecting something scandalous in return from me. Most men notice my pretty face and green eyes, and assume there is nothing at all between my ears. Then, of course, they discover I’m not married, and weigh the risks should they be caught misbehaving with me.”
That might have been too harsh for so early in the day, but she wanted it clear from the outset that she would remain blunt with him. She would not be mistaken for a woman who expected to be courted with fine words, or was eager for flattery. She’d kissed this man as part of a lesson and nothing more. She had to stop him smiling at her like he currently was.
Sullivan shrugged. “A smart man knows which woman is worth the risk of misbehaving with instinctively.” Despite her best efforts, Sullivan was still smiling at her. But it was early yet. He hadn’t mentioned his wife. Once he did that, there would be long sighs and the return of that deep cleft between his brows.
She put her hands on her hips and glared, annoyed with him for being so calm in the face of her blunt words. “You and Scarsdale must be quite the pair, or has he started tutoring you, too?”
“Take lessons? From him? Ha. I hardly need the teachings of a man who has never won your favor. He surely must have tried to seduce you by now.”
She fought the urge to confide that Scarsdale had sought to tempt her many times. She turned her back on Sullivan, moving toward the window to glance out, but there was nothing to see but brick walls from this room. “Somehow he still does quite well with the ladies.”
“Not with a proper one, and he’s clearly never been in love to know what he’s missing out on by flattering so many so insincerely.”
She turned back to the earl and found him closer than she cared for. He was much too tall and handsome today. She too easily remembered his taste, and the warmth of his hands. She moved away from him again, putting a large globe between them. She let her fingers drag over the sphere, making it turn and pretending to be thinking. “I know the answer to this of course, but why do you think he’s never loved a woman?”
Sullivan stopped the globe by planting his hand on it. “Because if he had ever been deeply enamored, he’d be married to the woman by now. Even if there were unsurmountable difficulties, he’d have moved heaven and earth to be by her side. Just as I did once before.”
There it was. The subtle mention of his enduring first love. She breathed a little easier now. “Some difficulties cannot be overcome,” she told him. And a wedding proved nothing. There were some obstacles, stains, that could never be erased to make a marriage a happy one.
Sullivan was suddenly at her side again. He touched her arms, running his bare fingertips up and down her skin lightly. “I see no difficulties here.”
Aurora stiffened her spine and walked away from him quickly. Kissing him last night had been a grave mistake. She’d revealed a side of herself she’d never wanted him or anyone in society to see. Aurora had relived their encounter all night…and come to the unpleasant conclusion that he might want to marry her, simply because he felt she was compromised.
Aurora hadn’t rejected his overtures soon enough, strongly enough, in the carriage to have been convincing. Too stunned by his request to kiss her for rational thought to have taken hold. And because his advances had been welcomed then, he likely assumed they would be today, as well. But she was wrong for him. “For us, do you mean?”
An assent rumbled up his throat. “I like the sound of that. Us.”
Aurora clenched her jaw. The earl had wanted her last night, and still did. She’d been right about him having intentions because of what she’d allowed already. He truly might ask her to marry him, and that was unfortunate. She turned to face him, her stomach in knots as she met his gaze. “But I don’t. You must never forget why you are here.”
“To be with you,” he said quickly.
“To marry.” She stepped toward him, drawing in a deep breath. For a change, his cologne did not distract her. It gave her strength to resist. “There can never be anything between us, you realize.” She stared at Sullivan, waiting for her denial to register.
His face slowly changed as the intent behind her words sank in and a frown appeared on his face. “But last night…”
She shrugged. “I won’t deny that I allowed you some liberties a courting man might hope for in a prospective bride. At the time, I did not perceive the very real danger that allowing you a simple favor of a kiss might lead you to assume I have an interest in marriage, too.”
“Honor requires a change of course, because it was you I kissed,” he said, his brow furrowing until those deep lines were etched between his brows. “I’ve made no secret of my desire to make a second marriage. I will marry you; I promise. You’ve no need to fear I would toy with your affections with so little regard for your future or reputation.”
He would destroy the peace she’d made with her past if she let him too close. “But I will not marry you, my lord. If my cousins’ marriages have led you to believe I, too, would be grateful for a similarly spectacular match, you are gravely mistaken.”