I look up to study his face with the red eyes and the slight puffiness aroundhiseyes. I palm his face, feeling fresh tears spring up.
“You’ve been crying too?” I ask.
“Courtesy of Dr. Musa.” He glances away and to the floor for a moment. “He sends his regards, by the way, and looks forward to meeting you.”
“You went to see him?”
“I needed to think things through, and he…well, he helps me do that.”
“I’m glad,” I whisper, so very proud of him and how far he’s come. How far we both have and for how far we still have to go…together.
“I know I didn’t want to do couples counseling before,” he says. “But I think it might be a good idea if we give it a try.”
I nod, almost scared to say much in case this is a dream and I wake myself up.
“I still have so much to work out on my own too,” he admits. “I’ll probably always want to fix things, to hold it all together. But I can get better.”
“I know you need to be strong for the people you love.” I angle my head so I can catch and hold his eyes with mine. “But I want to stand with you when it rains, when the wind comes. When it’s hard and the odds are stacked against us. We didn’t always do that before, but I believe if and when trials come, we will stand together.”
He presses his forehead to mine, palming my neck and bringing my lips to his.
“You have me,” I whisper into our kiss. “And I know you may not trust that. I can’t blame you, but I mean it. I’m not going anywhere.”
“That’s good.” He pulls back to push the hair away from my face. “Because I’m apparently not very good at losing things, and I’m really bad at losing you.”
I lean in to kiss him again, but the sound of paws on the hardwood floor makes us both turn our heads. Otis trots into the kitchen and walks up to Josiah, leaning his head into his hip, obviously angling to be touched.
Josiah rubs the huge dog behind his ears. “Whaddya say to coming home?” he asks.
Otis barks as if in complete support of this idea and we laugh.
“Byrd knew what she was doing leaving him with you,” I say. “She saw in you what I do. That you’ll do whatever is necessary for those you love.”
“And I do love you,” he says, the truth of it blazing clearly in his eyes. “I’m sorry I didn’t say it back before.”
“Don’t be. We have a lot to work out.” I laugh. “Hey, Merry and Ken have been shacking up for thirty years. I think we can take our time. I love you and there’s no rush.”
He angles my face up for another kiss. Compared to all the hot stolen moments we’ve shared lately, it’s chaste. A mere press of his lips to mine, but there’s such tenderness to it. It feels like it did before, inlaid with commitment and devotion, but laced with a new appreciation. Maybe we took what we had before for granted, didn’t know it was fragile becausewewere fragile in ways that had never been tested. Now, though, this thing between us is a tensile thread that I truly believe won’t snap when life jerks. His arms tighten around me, possessive, protective. It will take time for him to be sure I won’t slip away, so I’ll just keep standing still, held by him.
The kiss deepens, probes like he’s seeking answers in the touch of our lips, in the tangle of our tongues. We break apart, breathing hard, our foreheads bunting as I slip a hand behind his neck, anchoring us together.
“Ewww.”
Deja’s voice jars us both, and I can’t help but laugh at the disgusted look on her face as she enters the kitchen.
“We eat here,” she says, pointing to where I sit and he’s pressed to me. “Not anymore. That counter is officially suspect.”
I breathe out a laugh and Josiah’s chuckle vibrates through me at the places where we touch.
“What’s going on?” Kassim asks from just behind his sister. His wide eyes flick from us to Josiah’s suitcase standing by the door.
“It’s a lot to explain,” I say. “And we’ll talk through everything.”
Josiah clasps our hands together on the counter for our children to see.
“But long story short,” he says, his openly loving gaze set on me, setting me on fire, “I’m coming home.”
Epilogue