“You could have, too, if you’d wanted.”
“Not with a baby on the way and no income.”
“Well, you screwed Brandon in that bed, T. Wasn’t nobody gonna lay in it for you.”
“Bitch,” Terry snarls, standing, her fists balled at her sides. “You think just because you’re sick you can say anything you want to me and get away with it?”
“No, I think I can say anything I want to you and get away with it because you’re a cheat who hasn’t earned my respect.”
“Well, you respect this kidney, though, don’t you?”
“Take your kidney!” I shout, sitting up in the bed. “You and your kidney can catch the next flight back to Clearview, far as I’m concerned. I’ll get a kidney from someone I can actually stand.”
“Stop it!” Mama stands in the space separating Terry and me like a referee in a boxing ring. “Do you hear yourselves? You’re supposed to be sisters.”
“Sisters don’t do what she did,” I clip out, drained by the shouting match and falling limp on the pillows.
“I did you a favor and you know it,” Terry says. “Like you would have lasted in Clearview with that scholarship letter burning a hole in your drawer. You would have broken it off with him anyway.”
“Maybe that’s true. Who knows? But you slept with him a year before the scholarship and walked around all that time letting me believe he loved me.”
“He did love you.” Terry’s bitter laugh sounds like it hurts. “Everyone did.”
“So you decided to take everyone away from me? Or was that just an added bonus?”
“Nobody told your ass not to come home.”
“And look at you with him? Look at Quianna, knowing she was the result of you betraying me? The first time I saw her, I had to lock myself in my old room I was crying so hard. Not because she was a reminder, but because she was so beautiful.”
Tears spring to my eyes and I bite my lip to keep it from trembling. “She looked just like you, and I was angry I couldn’t just love her, just be her auntie without all of this between us.”
“You can,” Terry says more softly. “She barely knows you, but she wants to be just like you. She’s in every school play. Sings like she breathes.”
“Reminds us all of you,” Mama adds, smiling and sitting back down to pick up her knitting.
“She does?” I ask weakly.
“I told her I was coming out here about your kidney and she wanted to come, but she has exams,” Terry says. “We, um, haven’t been getting along lately. Not since she found out why you never come home.”
I recall her stricken expression, her anger in the kitchen when she overheard us arguing.
“I’m sorry she had to find out that way,” I say. “So she never knew about Brandon and me?”
“What was I supposed to say? I stole your daddy? I almost got rid of you because I didn’t want to lose my sis . . .” She doesn’t finish the thought, but I can see how saying even part of it affects her. Her lips tremble and her fingers clench around the knitting needles.
“Don’t say that, Terry,” Mama reprimands.
“Well, it’s true.” She lifts her chin defiantly. “Thank God I didn’t go through with it, but I was scared. I had no money and I knew it was shady, what Brand and me did. I was terrified of losing Neevah once she found out, and I did.”
“You didn’t even seem that sorry,” I tell her. “It felt like you had won something and I didn’t even know we were competing.”
“There was a small, petty part of me deep inside that felt like, finally, I have something she wants. I’m the best at something this one time.”
“The best at my boyfriend?” I ask in harsh disbelief. “You were the prettiest girl at our school. In the whole town, T. You could have had anyone you wanted, and you chose the one who should have been off-limits.”
“I was young and stupid. I paid for it.”
“It’s not so bad, Terry,” Mama says, her voice low and gentle. “You have a husband who loves you and an amazing daughter. A great job. A great life that most folks would envy. Learn to be content.”