“But I don’t believe that one can ever be too kind. Not to anyone who needs our help or the mom who taxed me, raised me, condemned me, harangued me, and gave me a hard time most of my life. Mom, I hope you find the peace in death that eluded you in life.”
After the mass was over, they went over to the cemetery and stood in the sun while the priest said the last words, and her casket was lowered into the ground. Even though she was a trial, he was going to miss her. He clenched his jaw. He couldn’t seem to move as the casket disappeared from view. Was this what grief did to him, or was it more? He’d swallowed a lot in his life and now that she was gone, he wasn’t sure how he felt, except for the betrayal. Was he just this beautiful thing without depth or substance?
He couldn’t help wondering if it had been his funeral, would his mom grieve for him?
Preacher walked over and clapped him on the shoulder, and it was like his brother had thrown him a lifeline.
“Hey, kid, how about you come surfing with me?” Preacher said gruffly.
“On the day of my mom’s funeral?” The inclination to say yes was tempting, but was it fitting to go have fun at the beach after burying his mom? Swallowing hard, his vision blurring, he locked his jaw and glanced back at the open grave and the fresh, dark earth waiting to cover her casket, trying to will away the awful constriction in his chest and throat. Maybe that was part of the problem. He had bottled up so much over the years—it was as if there simply wasn’t room for anything more and it was finally spilling out, whether he wanted it to or not.
“Why not?” He squeezed and GQ felt his stoic wall from the lead up to and during the funeral crumble. He bowed his head, the sting in his eyes turning into tears. Without a word, Preacher caught him up in a bear hug, and GQ leaned against him. His team crowded around, their support as tangible as the wind and the tears running down his cheeks.
“Yeah, surfing sounds good,” Hazard said, gently patting GQ’s face.
“Why don’t we all go?” Kodiak suggested.
“We can have a barbeque on the beach. How about that?” Skull asked. “Bones loves the water. I bet we can teach him to surf.”
GQ laughed at that. “That sounds almost as fun as watching all of you go ass over teakettle.” He would deal with the residual guilt. Life was for the living, and with his job, he needed to take all the fun he could get. His mom wouldn’t understand, but she never really had anyway.
“Hey, I can surf?” Hazard said.
“When he’s not surrounded by beach bunnies,” Skull said wryly.
“I do like me some cottontail,” Boomer said, wiggling his eyebrows.
“I can float like nobody's business,” Skull added.
“I think it sounds like a good plan,” Rose said, nudging her husband.
“It’s a great plan,” Iceman said. “C’mon kid.” He slung his arm around GQ’s shoulders and said, “Kodiak and Break, help Rose with the food, and grab my stuff, babe?”
“Okay, honey,” Kodiak said.
Rose chuckled and pushed the big man with the flat of her hand. He didn’t budge. “Of course,” she said. “I’ve got it covered.”
“Don’t forget my unicorn float,” Skull called.
Rose laughed, shaking her head as his teammates pushed and shoved him. “Perish the thought,” she said over her shoulder.
“Are you one of those sparkly vampires?” Boomer asked, a glint of amusement twinkling in his eyes.
“Shut the fuck up,” Skull said.
GQ didn’t know what he would have done without them as he found himself riding the swells with half of the team—Iceman, Boomer, Kodiak, and Breakneck who was…phenomenal. The kid kept his light under a bushel basket way too much. Although GQ couldn’t help being impressed by not only Break’s work ethic, his quiet professionalism, the kid never complained, and his accurate after accurate shots, but his athleticism was off the charts. He laughed his fool head off every time he caught sight of Skull on that damn float. And, true to form, Bones learned to surf like a boss.
Hazard did attract the ladies, but GQ stayed in the water. He couldn’t really deal with women right now.
“You realize one-half of the Goldilocks twins is getting all the action,” Preacher said with a smirk.
GQ grinned. He could see the dark circles under Preacher’s eyes and the disquiet in him. It was time he brought that out into the open. “Yeah, let him have it. After that last encounter, I’m not much interested in bunnies and strap hangers.”
“Aw, don’t give up hope, G. The right woman will come along and when she does, you’ll know it.”
“You think?”
“Yes.” He sighed and looked off into the distance.