All I want is to stay right here until Declan comes home and tells me what I can do. Because if I don’t wait for him … all I keep thinking is that I don’t want to die.
DECLAN
The relief I felt when I checked the security system and saw she didn’t touch the money and she was still there in my bed waiting for me leaves me the moment I open the bedroom door and get a glimpse of the state she’s in.
She didn’t take the money. She didn’t run. But my Braelynn is a shell of herself.
At the sound of the door closing, her wide, red-rimmed eyes peer up at me. Swallowing thickly, I push down the thought that resonates the most. Propped up on her side, her body’s stiff as the silence settles between us. I fucking hate myself for what I’ve done to her.
“My mother called,” she tells me as I unbutton the collar of my shirt. I can barely look at her as she tattles on herself. “We talked briefly but I didn’t tell her anything.”
I hum a response and then pull my shirt over my head, letting it fall to the floor. As I kick my shoes off by their heels, I face her and a small smile forms on its own from the sight of her staring up at me.
Wanting approval, from me. She fucking needs it.
“You can talk to your mother whenever you’d like … I trust you.”
Her throat tightens as she swallows and then explains, “She wants to see me.”
With one knee on the bed, I pause before giving her an inch of freedom. “If you want to see her, Nate can take you whenever and wherever you’d like.”
I expect her to be relieved, maybe even excited but the blood drains from her face.
Under the baggy sweater, my Braelynn appears so small and fragile. Her lips are no longer the dark red that tempts me, her eyes carry that color instead. And it shames me.
“Nate?” She barely breathes his name. Fear takes residence in her expression. A crease settles in my forehead as my brow pinches. Is she so afraid she needs me to come with her? What all did Aria tell her?
The bed groans as I lean back against the headboard and lay an arm out. “Come,” I command gently.
I’ve never thought of Braelynn as frail or weak. Never once until this past week. I thought she simply needed to recover, but the woman who lies beside me, closing her eyes the moment her side meets mine — she’s broken.
Her heart beats so fast and hard, I can hear it before she swallows thickly. “I don’t want you out alone …” I nearly tell her about the feds and the depositions. I nearly confess that there’s a very strong chance she’s going to be questioned about Scarlet’s death. But peering down at her, she already appears on edge. Carter’s words haunt me: she’s fucking terrified.
“I wanted to go home and grab some things, swing by my mother’s and if I—”
“Nate can take you or I can when a few things blow over.”
Her deep brown eyes stay wide open, staring aimlessly at my chest.
I pull her closer and hold her tighter. I run my hand through her hair and attempt to comfort her.
“Could you take me tonight?” she questions and her voice is tight. As if she needs my answer to be yes.
McHale told me to stay in. Not to go anywhere. There’s a high chance of a raid soon in The Club. How do I tell her that? “I’m stuck here too tonight, my naïve girl.” Nate’s deposition is scheduled, so there’s no risk for him going out. She’ll stay away from all the bullshit that being out with me puts her at risk of witnessing.
“You’re stuck with me?” she questions in a raspy voice.
“It all needs to die down for the moment, so I’d rather we didn’t go anywhere tonight or at all this week.”
With a kiss on her temple, I expect her to understand but she doesn’t.
“I can’t stay here forever,” she whispers.
“Whatever you need from your house, Nate can go get,” I offer her.
She squirms uncomfortably. “I don’t want Nate to take me anywhere or …”
“Nate is going to look after you and do whatever I order him to do. You are mine,” I tell her, gripping her chin and tilting it upward so she’s forced to look at me. She averts her gaze until I run the pad of my thumb over her lips.