“Say something.”
“I think you’re wise beyond your years, Sadie. For what it’s worth, I value your friendship too. A lot. I don’t see you as just a fun distraction. I’ve told you before, you deserve more than that. And I really do hope that you get the closure you deserve from Tim. I’ll always be your friend.” He squeezes my hand and stands up. “Thanks again for allowing me the pleasure of spending Christmas with you and your family; they’re wonderful people.”
I don’t know why I feel like I’m going through a breakup all over again. My chest tightens, and tears begin to pool in my eyes.
“Don’t do that,” he says, reaching out to wipe one that broke free. “This isn’t goodbye, kitten. Reach out if you need anything.”
And with that, he turns and walks to the elevators.
* * *
“Three…Two…One…Happy New Year!”
I raise my glass to toast with my friends as we watch the ball drop in Times Square. I smile and yell cheers, but my mind is elsewhere. I wish I’d invited Alex. I wonder what he’s doing, if he’s having a good time. I pull out my phone to send him a text, but when I click on our text thread, I already see the three little bubbles dancing, indicating he’s typing a message.
Alex:Happy New Year Sadie. I hope you’re having an amazing and fun night with your friends. Just wanted to let you know I’m thinking of you and sending you love and happiness going into the new year. PS…if I were with you, I’d be kissing you right now.
“Look at her smiling, you know that dick is goooood,” Caleb says, making Ariel and Karlie laugh.
I roll my eyes and turn around to tap out my reply to Alex.
Me:I was just about to text you! Happy New Year to you too. I’ve been thinking about you too. I miss you. I wish you were here to kiss me.
Before I can overthink it, I hit send.
“Just go over to his place already,” Caleb yells.
“What? No, we agreed to take space. I thought you guys agreed it was a good idea?”
“I’m just saying go get some, I’m not saying go propose to the man.”
I look over at Ariel and Karlie. “Should I?” Before they can answer, I’ve already talked myself out of it. “No.” I shake my head and slide my phone back into my pocket. “I said I’d take time and I’m going to take time.”
* * *
The next morning,I leave Karlie’s house early, stopping for a cup of coffee on the way home. When I exit the shower, I see a text from Alex, and my heart skips a beat.
Alex: I promise I’m respecting your boundaries, just wanted to make sure you made it home safely?
Me: I did, thank you. What did you end up doing?
Alex: I don’t want to tell you, you’ll be mad.
My stomach drops at his response.
Alex: I stayed home and worked.
Relief washes over me. The thought of him going out with another woman entered my mind for a brief second, which he is free to do. We never made any commitments to each other, and I’m the one who told him I needed space.
Me: What are you doing today? Want to grab coffee?
Alex: I’d love to…as your friend.
He sends a smiley emoji, and it makes me laugh.
Me:Yes…friends. Meet here. See you soon.
I place my phone down and go back to my morning routine, applying a touch of makeup and running the blow-dryer through my hair. I’ve just barely started drying it when I think I hear a knock at my door. I check my phone. No text from Alex, and it seems too soon after our text. I turn off the blow-dryer and listen. Sure enough, someone is knocking.