Well, I know what he’s literally doing here. He’s captaining a tour boat because the universe is full of fun surprises today.
What I want to know is, what is he doing, ushering me into the single seat right next to the captain’s chair?
“But,” Carson starts, looking helplessly from me to Ashley.
Ashley looks deeply uncomfortable now that she’s faced with her mistake—setting me up on a blind date in the vicinity of my ex-boyfriend.
The only way I’ve been able to avoid seeing Herc is by going nowhere. I rarely leave the house, so I had no idea he gave boat tours.
Sightseeing on the lake was a last-minute decision by the group.
Once we’d all assembled at the entrance of the Rocky Broad Riverwalk a few moments ago, Ashley complained that her boyfriend (I’d thought), Carson, didn’t have proper shoes for river boulder walking.
I’d tried not to seethe,then why is he here?
Ha. I was still operating under the assumption that Carson was Ashley’s boyfriend. The plus-one that she’d mentioned.
“Then, everyone else can get in the river, and your boyfriend can wait on the boardwalk with Cass,” I told Ashley. Then, I’d turned to Carson and smiled politely. “It’s a quick little horseshoe-shaped path of rocks on the water, and it makes for fun group photos. You could do it barefoot, easy. Or we’ll meet you and Cass on the other end of the boardwalk.”
Cass was all smiles, but Titus shut down that idea, not liking the idea of anyone but him staying behind with his pregnant wife. “I’ll stay too, then,” Titus said.
Carson looked at me, confused. Then Ashley burst out laughing. “Carson? He’s not my boyfriend; he’s my cousin.”
She never mentioned that.
That’s when it hit me: Carson was a plus-one, alright. Not Ashley’s plus-one.Myplus-one.
And I will unfriend everyone in this group who was in on this set-up.
Now, being forced to board the tour boat where I don’t want to be, I smile politely like my mother taught me. “Have a seat, Carson. It’s just an hour’s trip.”
I hope I don’t sound too salty, though I am still unhappy that we didn’t get to enjoy taking photos on the Broad River as planned. The water is loud there, making it easy to pretend I don’t hear questions about my love life. And I was looking forward to shopping at the general store in Chimney Rock with Leela. I love stocking up on root beer barrel candies for me, and new touristy coffee mugs for the lake house.
Carson reluctantly slides into a seat next to his cousin Ashley, and I stand there staring at Herc while he accepts surprise greetings and hugs from Titus, his sister, and everyone else.
The pregnant Cass needs to find a seat before she passes out from the awkwardness, so she’s the next one to find a seat.
Crosby and Herc shoot the shit while everyone waits for the remaining random passengers to board. Meanwhile, Leela, whose hand is in Crosby’s unrelenting grip, shoots me the eyeball. Her wide gaze is full of questions.
I tell her with my eyes that no, I had no idea Herc worked on the tour boats.
She flares her nostrils, shaking her head. I know that look: she wants to kill Ashley for this detour.
I smile wanly and give the tiniest shrug, like, “what am I gonna do? Let’s just get through this.”
Briefly, I catch Leela’s eyes cutting to Herc, then they’re back on me. One subtle eyebrow lifts. This bitch is telling me nothing I don’t already know: Herc looks good. Damn good.
I shoot her a warning look and suck my lips into my mouth.
And then my best girlfriend lets me see the faintest smile pull at the corner of her lips.
I shake my head. Not subtle at all.
She laughs.
I laugh.
Looking past Leela’s shoulder, I see Cass rubbing her belly and smiling at a family of ducks that Titus has pointed out. Ashley is not making eye contact with anyone. Carson looks bored and is scrolling on his phone. Mila is destroying Ozzie at a game of thumb war.