“Can I see him?” I ask, fighting to keep my voice steady.
“He’s still unconscious,” the doctor turns to me with a sickly polite smile that makes my gut twist.
“I’m hiswife,” I snap tightly.
“He needs rest,” the doctor states again. I tense my jaw, hands curling into fists ready to attack the doctor if he doesn’t let me through when Sienna pointedly clears her throat. The doctor hesitates for a moment before he nods.
Ignoring the eyes heavy on my back, even Sienna’s gentle touch on my arm as I pass, I stride through the crowd and into Killian’s hospital room.
The world fades into silence the moment the door closes. Silence broken by the steady beeping of a heart monitor. Killian’s eyes are closed, his dark hair a little tangled and his hands curled into loose fists on top of crisp blue sheets.
I’ve been here before, facing my father.
I’ve felt this pain before, the fear of losing a loved one.
Even still, this hits differently.
Like a piece of me is trapped in that bed with him.
The sight of him seizes my chest and a sob bubbles up loosely in my chest. I let it escape, no one can hear me here. Approaching the bed, Killian seems smaller than I’m used to seeing him. Even when I wake before him at night he still paints an imposing presence but here?
Here he’s small and pale and Ihateit.
“Killian?” Despite it all, I can’t help myself. I want to hear his voice, and see those steely eyes pinning me in place but nothing greets me.
Who would do this? Who even got close enough to do this?
Could have been with someone else?
No, no he would never.
My mind runs wild with thoughts and theories, anything to explain this because I know it wasn’t me. Itwasn’t.
Lowering myself into the chair by his bed, I slide one of my hands into his loose fist and the chill from his skin steals across my own. He’s so cold.
God if he hadn’t been with Dante, I could have come home to him dead on the floor.
Another sob rips out of my chest and I don’t fight them now. Tears spill hot down my cheeks and my shoulders rock as my sorrows take me, pain pouring out as I cry into the emptiness of the room.
“Fuck,” I sob, “this is fucked up. So fucking fucked up. We’re so close. We’re so close to beinghappy.” Wiping the tears with the back of my free hand, I lean down and press my damp lips to the back of his chilled hand.
“You better wake up soon, you hear me?” I say softly, “I’ve just… come to the realization that I love you and— and you can’t leave me now, okay? Not after all of this. So you better wake up soon.”
The heartbeat monitor lurches faintly on its next beat and then those cool fingers wrap slowly around mine. My head darts up and my heart punches up into my throat as I come face to face with Killian and those tired butgorgeousgrey eyes meet mine.
“Oh,thank god.”
17
KILLIAN
“Well, well, well,” I chuckle dryly, instantly regretting it as my throat catches on itself and a rough cough darts up. I fight past it, even as Cara’s dark eyes dart wide in concern.
“Oh Killian,” Cara gasps, “I was so scared you weren’t going to wake up. Oh fuck, I’m so glad you’re okay.”
“I thought you still harbored some ill will in your heart.” It’s meant to be a joke but my teasing smile comes across more as a grimace and Cara’s eyes go wider still as she clutches at my hand.
“Killian, I would never!”