Physical therapy is over, and I have come to terms with the one-handed life. My doctor keeps trying to push a second surgery, and I haven’t ultimately ruled it out. I just know I’ll be down for months recovering and just don’t have the time or money to make that work right now. The internship, however, is actually a paid one, and I live here for free. So I have been stacking up a good saving account, which will help me when I return to Savannah. I’m just hoping that things will be different when I get there, and I’ll be able to stay. I know where I belong, but the journey to get there seems never-ending.
I pick myself up off the wooden dock and situate my blanket over my shoulders.
I stumble back inside the cottage, trying not to trip over all the camera equipment, and make my way over to the bay window overlooking the lake. I can’t help but dream as I watch the fireworks illuminate the skyline, alone.
CHAPTER 43
JUDSON
September 30
After six long months of not-so-patiently waiting, today is the day we take down Ryan with the DEA. We followed him for months learned his patterns, and the names of several of the guys he works for. Well, technically, we know several alias names but enough information to find out who is running the operation in this area. We worked with the DEA for weeks, developing a plan to bust him, and today we will see it through.
Carter and I get dressed and ride with our DEA agent we've been working with, Maxwell, to the location of Ryan's next drop. Maxwell hides the sleek black SUV behind the run-down building, along with several other cop cars, in case the arrest attempt goes south. I didn't necessarily need to be here, but Carter and I decided that we wanted to see this in person after all of the work we put into this. I want to look Ryan in the eye as they push his head into the back of the police car.
My phone buzzes in my pocket, and I pull it out to Jameson's face.
Shit. I tap ignore again since that is what I do lately. We haven't told him about this plan, and keeping it from him for the past six months has been pretty hard. We didn't want him involved if Ryan got to him. We know for sure Ryan was keeping tabs on him. Jay is as loyal as they come, but let's face it, he has a big mouth. Two shots of tequila, and he will tell you his entire life story.
Several hours go by, and we have yet to see Ryan or any sign of movement from inside the building. Maxwell insists that maybe they were tipped off when a car pulls into the lot. Cops come from around the side of the building, guns pulled, surrounding the car. The door swings open, and a man steps out with his hands in the air.
It'snotRyan.
The guy is forced to the ground and handcuffed. I can feel my heart sinking lower into my stomach as I start to feel sick. Carter looks over at me.
"Man, I'm sorry, I thought for sure this was it." The sympathy in his voice is making it crack.
"It's okay. I'm just not sure what we do now."
"We regroup, we will figure it out, Jud, don't give up."
The car rolls down the road, and all I can do is look out the window and pray that there is another chance.
Carter drops me off at the house and decides to stay here for a few days while we decide what we will do. I push the door open and sling my keys on the counter. I look around and pick the keys back up. I don't want to be here. This was supposed to be it, put Ryan away, and go get my girl. Now I'm back where I started, with absolutely nothing accomplished but a whole lot of wasted time. It was easier for him to believe that she doesn't mean anything and we are done, simply because I don't want her killed.
I pull into the docks and climb out of my truck. After everything that has happened today, I decided it'd be best to take the boat out for the night. It's warm, but it's been raining for two days, so the fog lingers above the water. Nobody seems to be hanging around here, but that is expected for a Sunday night.
Just as I am making my way out onto the wooden boards, I hear what sounds like footsteps behind me. I turn to see Ryan quick on my heels. I can feel the rage radiating off of him as he grabs me by my shirt, throwing me to the ground. His hand wraps tightly around my throat as he speaks, "I told you to stop, Judson. This is the only way you are going to learn that you can't win. You think I didn't know you were following me? I guess I'm going to have to do the work myself this time."
I attempt to wiggle my way out from under him, but he weighs a little more than I do. I lift my hand off the wood and send a punch, best I can, to his ribcage. He rolls off me and grabs my shoulder, pushing me into the water. I feel his hands wrapped tightly in the fabric of my t-shirt near my shoulders as he holds me under. I fight him for what seems like hours. The single breath that I could take before going under wasn't ideal, and I can feel myself getting light-headed. I slow my struggle. The water is dark and murky, so I close my eyes and try to focus on something else while striving not to breathe water into my lungs.
The only images that come to my mind are Blakely.
Blakely in that white dress at the fundraiser, her smile wide as she straddles me in the car.
Blakely wearing my T-shirt, it hanging to her knees, with her bare legs and feet.
Blakely standing on the beach, in her pink bikini, holding my hand.
Blakely cuddled up to me in the hotel room in Tennessee.
Blakely cooking in the kitchen, her lengthy hair hanging over the back of the patio chair.
Blakely's lips parted as she pulls me down to her, claiming me as hers.
All of these thoughts that I wish I could go back and re-live flood my mind, just before everything goes completely black.
CHAPTER 44