He opened his mouth as if to speak, only to shake his head and grab my upper arm instead. I looked from his hand to his face, trying to read the confusing emotion in his eyes.
Once again, he remained silent while I waited. When the silence grew too charged, he burst into motion, tugging me down the closest path and behind a stand of trees. Soft lantern light still filtered through, but we were mostly out of sight of the ballroom.
“Rek," I said uneasily, remembering his earlier words. If anyone saw us back here, they might get the wrong idea. “What’s going on with you? Are you sure there hasn’t been any sign of the thieves?”
“The thieves?” He frowned at me. “I’d forgotten all about them.”
“Rek!” Now I was sure something was wrong. “We were just talking about them a minute ago.”
“Were we?” He groaned, dropping my arm and taking a step back before abruptly stepping forward again. “I can’t remember the last time I was so distracted at a royal function.”
“That’s understandable.” I tried to put my own confusion aside to be supportive. “It’s not every day you find a lost treasure cave full of wonders beyond counting that also happens to be overrun with deadly thieves.”
“The cave?” He laughed, the sound half pained, half amused. “My distraction began before I knew anything about the cave.” He took my arm again, reaching for the other one as well and looking down into my confused face. “As you said, there are so many memories.”
“Rek, what is going on?” I gave the words a sharp edge, out of patience with his strange pronouncements and abstraction. “When I saw you in the ballroom, you reacted more coldly than if I were a stranger. And now you’ve dragged me out here.”
“I’m sorry.” His voice was soft. “You’re right, I’m behaving erratically. And I’m not used to behaving erratically. It’s…confusing.”
My laugh was shaky. “Yes, it certainly is.”
Part of me wanted to pull away and march straight back into the ballroom, leaving him to work out whatever perturbation he seemed to be under alone. But I made no attempt to leave.
Even with his cold behavior, I couldn’t help the way everything in me leaned toward Rek. Far too much of me was reveling in being out here with him, practically alone beneath the moonlight. I didn’t want him to let go, I wanted him to put his arms all the way around me and pull me close.
I took a slow breath, trying to get myself under control, but the ball and the dress and the look on Iola’s face had combined to bring out my inner rebellious streak. I’d stopped listening to my sensible self.
I stayed in place.
Rek shook his head, a sharp movement. “I’m sorry,” he repeated. “You don’t deserve any of this. But that’s the problem. I spent three years thinking you did.”
“That’s not your fault,” I said, trying to follow the thread of his thinking. “You were lied to.”
He let go of me again and took several strides away down the path that led into the dark garden. I watched him go in bewilderment, but he abruptly swung back around and strode back.
“I know that now. And I know you were lied to as well. It’s not your fault either.” His intense, turbulent gaze locked on mine. “Even before I learned the truth, I thought I’d overcome my anger. I thought I’d left it all in the past. But seeing you again in the forest—it all came rushing back as if you only left yesterday. It turned out I hadn’t defeated my feelings at all.” He cut off abruptly, his gaze dropping from mine.
“That’s understandable,” I whispered, trying to catch my breath now he was no longer piercing me with his eyes.
“Perhaps.” His gaze jumped back to me, a wry smile I didn’t understand spreading over his face. “Yes, it’s very understandable. But I spent so long feeding that anger. And now that you’re back—” He sighed. “For you, all your memories of this place are frombefore. I have those memories, too, but I also have years of memories from after. Years when I told myself I hated you.”
He shook his head. “Sometimes when I see you, those are the emotions that come flooding back, and other times—” He broke off awkwardly before finishing. “Most of the time, I remember the truth, and all of that is washed away. But it’s hard to turn off such intense feelings.”
My brow creased. “I think I understand.”
His warm smile enfolded me. “Of course you do. That’s one of the things I always liked best about you. I never had to endlessly explain things to you. But this…” His mouth quirked sideways. “I’m not sure even you understand…”
His words trailed away, and the space between us shrank. Where had all the air gone? Every nerve in my body seemed heightened, the warmth of his breath brushing across my cheek making my own catch.
“So many confused emotions.” His words were almost inaudible, more felt on my skin than heard with my ears. “But when it comes to you, Zaria, all of them so intense.”
Despite myself, despite the sensible part of my brain screaming at me to pull back, my eyes drifted shut. Was it only the false magic of moonlight that made me feel the upcoming brush of his lips against mine?
“Your Highness!” The low call made him jerk away, cold night air rushing in to extinguish the heat in my cheeks.
My eyes flew open, but I couldn’t see anyone near our stolen hideaway. Rek leaned to the side, peering toward the ballroom.
“Jerome.” He sounded disgruntled. “Did Father send him to search for me?”