Prologue
Fifteen Years ago
Everything seems so big as Mommy walks me into the new house; she says we’re gonna live here. The nice man who told her that we could stay, she says he’s nice, and he will protect us. I don’t understand why we need protection though. He’s big, giving me the ‘don’t mess with me’ vibe. I see the stairs that lead somewhere different, and all I can think is, there’s more?
The places we’ve stayed were either hotels, or small little rooms that we shared with wallpaper peeling off the walls. I found a rat once in the corner of a room, I screamed, and Mommy had us leave right then. I bet this place doesn’t have any rats, or mice. Shoot, I gasp when one of the boys leads us into the kitchen. I tug on Mommy’s dress and point at the stack of pancakes sitting on the table.
“I’ll get you some food shortly,” she whispers. My tummy growls, the last time we ate was some time yesterday, and I’m really hungry.
“She can have some,” the boy with dark hair and pretty blue eyes says, reaching up on the table to pull them closer to us. “Sit and eat.” He pulls a chair out for me. He’s just a little taller than me, Dashell. I think that’s what he called himself when I met him at the park a while ago.
I look up at Mommy to get permission. She just nods, but I can see she’s sad about something. I don’t know why she’s so sad all the time. I just want to hug her and make her feel better.
“Are you thirsty?” the other boy asks, his hair isn’t as dark as Dashell’s hair. I think he is Mitchell. I want to laugh, Mitchell and Dashell. They are funny names, but Mommy said to be quiet and keep close to her.
I nod, keeping my promise of being quiet. I don’t know what I would say anyways, I don’t really know these boys. I just met them at the park when Mommy talked to their daddy. After we met them the first time, I asked Mommy about my daddy, and she said that he was gone, but I don’t know what she means. She just says to not worry about it. I trust Mommy, she knows what's best for us, but why do we have to live with people? I liked staying in hotels with her.
Mitchell brings me a small cup, sitting it by me with a big smile. He’s missing some teeth; I’m still waiting for this tooth that’s wiggly in the front to fall out, but I’m too scared to pull it. It might hurt. So I leave it there, wiggly and all.
I smile back at Mitchell who sits next to me as I stab my pancake and push it into my mouth. “It's so good. Right? My dad makes the best pancakes!” Dashell is so excited sitting at the table across from me.
Letting out a small laugh, I reach for my cup and take a drink to wash down the pancake. “Do you want more, sweetheart?” I hear Mitchell ask me. I turn to look at him and nod my head. He puts another pancake on my plate as Dashell lets out a groan.
“I wanted to get it for her.” Dashell puts his arms on the table, reaching for more pancakes.
“There’s plenty of pancakes for everyone. Please sit. Let’s all eat.” I look over to see the big man my mommy has talked to before. He walks away, not coming near me, and sits all the way at the other end.
“I’m fine, thank you,” Mommy says, sitting down at the other end of the table next to me. She uses her fingers and traces along my arm, giving me goosebumps. “Eat up so we can go get you in the bath,” she says softly.
“The boys will show you to your room when you’re finished eating,” the big man says, looking at Mommy like he’s mad.
“Very well.” Mommy grabs a plate and picks up one pancake. She eats it without syrup and smiles at the man. “Now can they show us the room?” I look down at my plate; I am full now, so I can leave the table.
“Dash.” The big man calls him Dash, not Dashell. Can I call him that? My eyes wander over to Mitchell who stands up from the table and takes my plate over to the sink.
“Come on.” Dashell holds out a hand for me to take. I take it, and he walks me out of the kitchen and up those big stairs. “Your room is right up here,” he says, pointing at the first door I see. “We’re down the hall.” I turn my head following his finger to see four doors. I wonder where the bathroom is? I kinda have to potty.
“This is where you and your mom will stay.” Mitch catches up to us, pulling Mommy along with him. He opens the door revealing a large room, with a big bed and a dresser. There’s not much in here, but the bed looks comfy.
“You can put your things in there or in the closet.” Mitch shows us the closet, which is like a room too. It’s so big. We could even use the closet for my room so Mommy has her own space.
“The bathroom is down the hall, the door in the center,” Mitchell says as he pulls Dashell away from me. I feel his hand get pulled out of mine, and then they just leave Mommy and me standing in the room alone.
“What now, Mommy?” I ask, using my hands to smooth out my dress.
“Now, we take a shower and get ready for a day of unpacking.” She squats down to be at my level. “This place will be our new home. We’ll be safe here.” She kisses my cheek, stands up, and moves to the bed, sitting down to just stare at the wall.
Keep us safe from what? Why are we always moving?
Almost Two Years ago
We all clap and shout for Mitch as he walks across the stage to collect his diploma. He’s officially graduated High School. I’m not sad about it, but I’ll miss seeing him in the hallway. I have two years left, hell, all three of us have two years left. Dash cheers for his brother a little louder than I thought he would. I think he’s proud of his brother, but I know he’s also jealous that Mitch gets to leave all this behind. The curse of a smaller city, well, basically a town. Where everyone knows everyone.
My mom stands and claps, but she doesn’t cheer, she’s just here to save face, she hates being here. She hates living here. I’m not sure why, though. Darrell, my step-father, has provided us with everything we would ever need, a safe place to live, food on the table, and clothes on our backs. Everything she says she wanted for me. Yet, she hates it. I never understood why she kept us here, playing the doting wife when I can clearly see how unhappy she is.
Darrell, my step-father, claps and cheers for his first born son like a proud father should. He’s talked about this day throughout Mitch’s entire senior year. Talking about Mitch doing big things.
I, of course, stand in the crowd next to all of them cheering the loudest. Mitch has been my protector for so long that I don’t know what I’ll do at school without him there. Dash and his friend, Colson, are on the football team so I stay quiet to make sure I don’t make too much noise when they celebrate the boys. Half the time I feel like I’m just here to be here, a pretty face in the stands. But what they don’t realize is how grateful I am to all of them. Mitch, who has stood up for me on several occasions at school when one of the older kids would pick on me for being Mitch and Dash’snot so sister. Which is the lamest way of saying I don’t belong. I’ve known I didn’t belong for years. I found Mitch, Dash, Colson, and Darrell having a secret conversation, and the second I walked in the room, they were all hush hush about it. I’ve never in my life fit in anywhere, and I’m okay with that. Because when I graduate, I won't stick around to see the looks I get from everyone.